


Truly, Madly, Deeply

by carissima



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Fluff, M/M, Prompt Fill, Teacher!Liam, always fluff, civilian!Liam, famous!harry, nothing but fluff, popstar!harry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-29
Updated: 2013-10-29
Packaged: 2017-12-30 19:30:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 21,570
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1022532
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/carissima/pseuds/carissima
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Harry's a famous popstar. Liam's a mostly-broke teacher. Liam's pretty much perfect. Harry pines.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Truly, Madly, Deeply

**Author's Note:**

> This is based on two prompts, one for pining Harry based on the 1D song Truly Madly Deeply and another for Famous!Harry/Civilian!Liam with Harry all about Liam bordering on obsessive (in a good way!). Basically, everyone loves it when Harry pines for Liam.
> 
> I'm a little obsessed with this one. I may have a small sequel planned already. Hmm.

Pulling his beanie a little lower so that it covers more of his trademark curls, Harry looks up through lazy, lowered eyes to scan the crowd. So far they'd been lucky and no one had recognised them, standing in a small bar in the middle of the city. Then again, this particular crowd is probably not expecting to see the three members of the biggest boyband in the world just chilling in a small, dark, almost dingy indie bar.

The bar is so dark that Harry feels safe here, like he can finally be himself. He relishes these moments, after two years of being on his best behaviour, being polite and thoughtful and charming at all times. Harry likes to think he really is all those things, that it comes naturally to him for a reason, but it's hard work to stay switched on every day, with every person he comes into contact with, with every person he passes on the street or in corridors. It's a lot to ask of a person, to be perfect all the time.

Sometimes he just gets angry with the intrusive paparazzi, but he can't show even a flicker of annoyance without it being all over the internet within minutes. And sometimes he wants to just have dinner with friends or family and not spend half an hour signing autographs, but he knows better than to give in to that urge.

But tonight, perhaps he can just be himself and lose himself in the music in this worn, tired old club that smells of old beer and tobacco. He can sit at the bar and listen to good, raw music and forget that in the morning, he'll have to get up and smile through six interviews, answering the same question over and over again before heading into the studio to start recording their third album. And while they're all much happier with this album than the previous ones, mostly because they've actually written some of the songs and had real input as to the choice of what makes the cut for the album, it's still not quite the sound they want to put out there. But they're ruled by the record label and their core audience right now is teenage girls and boys, so that's who they have to cater for. Or more accurately, what management thinks teenagers want to listen to.

Harry dreams of the day they can turn around and dictate their sound and their message. He knows it'll happen one day, he just has to hold out long enough to make it happen.

"Stop thinking so much, it hurts my head to watch you," Louis says in his ear before he slips into the stool next to Harry and indicates to the bartender that they'd like three more warm, weak beers.

"I like it here," Harry murmurs as he stares down into his glass as if it holds the answers to life's questions. "It was a good choice."

"Thought you'd like it," Louis says cheerfully. He's wearing baggy, dull clothing in his own attempts to go incognito and he's wearing a fedora that Harry secretly covets but he'll never admit it, not to Louis.

"Where's Niall?" Harry asks idly as the band strikes up again and Harry's ears perk up to absorb it all, to soak it all into his very skin.

Louis takes a long gulp of his drink and winces before indicating somewhere behind him, towards the crowd gathering around the band. It's a small venue but there are a couple of hundred people huddled around, enjoying the atmosphere and intimacy between music-lovers. "He was chatting to some girls who were pretending not to know who he was."

Niall's only attempt to hide his identity was to wear a baseball cap. It was hardly the best disguise, especially since Niall wore baseball caps on stage all the time, but Harry hadn't cared enough to put up a fight before they'd left Harry's apartment that evening.

All he cares about is one night of anonymity for himself. One night to be Harry, rather than Harry Styles, popular boybander with the great hair and great smile. One night where there's no pressure to conform and he can just be.

As the night wears on, the music seeps into him and he loses himself, swaying and tapping his foot, keeping his eyes on the band or on Louis, and sometimes Niall when he appears for his next round of beers, but making a concerted effort not to catch anyone's eye or draw any attention to himself whatsoever. He spent the first hour trying to spot anyone trying to subtly take their pictures or seeing if anyone was looking at them with recognition, but when the night wears on and they're left alone, Harry relaxes into the mood of the night until he's loose and pliable, laughing with Louis as they reminisce over fun times on tour or back to the years before they made it, when they were on the indie circuit themselves before they got signed and their music morphed into pop.

He's so relaxed that as he heads back from a trip to the bathroom, he forgets to keep an eye on where he's going and he walks straight into something so solid that he thinks maybe he's drunk more than he should have because he's walked into a damn wall.

Except that wall is gripping his arm and asking him in a concerned voice if he's okay.

"What?" Harry asks dazedly as he shakes his head slowly and blinks before looking up from where he's slightly bent over, trying to catch his breath.

"Are you okay?" the boy asks, and he looks anxious.

Harry takes a deep breath and stands up a bit straighter before he glances across at the boy in front of him. His first thought is that this boy is probably not so much a boy like he'd thought. He's just a little shorter than Harry, with short brown hair that rises into a small almost-quiff. He's tanned with a smattering of facial hair that trails across his jaw, distracting Harry for a second as he follows it with his gaze before resting on his lips. Harry thinks he's never seen such beautiful lips before, full, pink and fleshy with the slightest hint of a permanent lower lip pout that he's probably not even aware of, Harry imagines. He finally drags his gaze up to see beautiful brown eyes looking at him in distress and it finally occurs to him that he's been staring at this man for far longer than he should have and he really needs to answer his question.

"I'm fine," Harry manages to say and if his voice is a little breathy, it's probably because he's still a little out of breath from the collision and nothing to do with this man and his beautiful features. "Sorry, didn't see you there."

"Oh no, it's my fault, I wasn't looking."

Harry just wants to move past him and leave, but he's pretty solid and unmoving, blocking his way.

"Really, it's okay," Harry says and he ducks his head as he takes a step forward.

"Let me buy you a drink," the man says a little desperately.

Harry's head snaps up as he considers this stranger, wonders if he knows who Harry is and is making a move on him or trying to get friendly before he tries to use Harry for something. It's happened to him, and Niall and Louis, more times than they care to remember. It's made Harry wary and cautious.

"No thank you," Harry says firmly. "It's fine, honestly."

"But I feel awful," he says and Harry idly thinks that he's probably a very good actor because he's not letting any recognition show in his face. "I almost winded you, for God's sake. The least I can do is buy you a drink. Please?"

He looks so damn earnest that Harry starts to feel a little sorry for him before he hardens against the feeling. "Fine, one drink."

"Oh thank you," he says in relief and leads the way to the bar. He asks Harry what he wants and grimaces a little at Harry's choice of brand as he orders two beers. Neither of them try to fill the silence that builds between them as they wait for the bartender to return.

When he's been handed his drink, Harry looks up to thank him quietly.

"No, please it was all my fault. Thanks for letting me buy you a drink, I'd have spent all night worrying about it if you hadn't," the man says and Harry thinks he can detect a note of calm and control in his voice that hadn't been there earlier. "I hope you enjoy the rest of the night. The band is excellent tonight."

Harry blinks in honest surprise as the man moves past him, his gaze already elsewhere as if he's actually going to leave Harry there without asking for anything, as if he truly doesn't know who Harry is.

He's just about to lift his hand to stop him, to introduce himself properly, which is a revelation because he hasn't done that in months, hasn't had the urge to make the effort to decipher someone's intentions, when Louis appears before his mystery man with a beaming smile.

"Well, Harry, who's your friend?" Louis asks as he grins up at the gorgeous stranger, who looks back blankly and realises who Louis is talking to.

"I'm not sure," Harry murmurs as he catches the man's gaze. "We didn't get around to introducing ourselves."

"I'm Louis, this is Harry," Louis says smartly as he holds out his hand.

"I'm Liam," the man says and shakes Louis' hand. "Nice to meet you."

"It's very nice to meet you too," Louis says as he turns to Harry expectantly.

Harry rolls his eyes but he's grateful to Louis for forcing the introduction because as far as he can see, and he's gotten very good at looking under the surface, Liam has no idea who they are and Harry is intrigued.

"Hi Liam," Harry says with a small smile, making sure to keep his dimples in check just in case they jog Liam's memory. "Thanks for the beer."

"You didn't introduce yourself to the gorgeous, fit man buying you a drink?" Louis flirts as he looks at Liam with a grin. "I'm surprised at you, Harold."

"Oh no, really, I was just buying Harry a drink because I ran into him and almost sent him flying," Liam says, wide-eyed. "I really am sorry."

"Well aren't you just the sweetest," Louis says, placing his hand on Liam's arm and Harry's gaze narrows in on it. Louis notices and smiles to himself, which Harry misses because he's focused on Liam's forearm and Louis' grip on it. "So Liam, what brings you to this dive?"

"Oh, my mate Zayn does band reviews for a blog," Liam explains with a shy smile. "He's always dragging me to places like this."

"Sounds like a lot of fun," Louis says, when he glances over to Harry with a raised eyebrow which basically telegraphs that as soon as Liam's mate appears, their cover is blown.

"Yeah, it is," Liam agrees with a broad smile that Harry is momentarily mesmerised by. Liam's eyes almost disappear into a squint as his smile lights up his face and Harry is drawn closer, into Liam's space. "I get to see and hear a lot of new bands before they hit the charts. It's pretty cool."

"So you like music then, Liam?" Louis asks and Harry has to hide a smile as Liam nods enthusiastically.

"I mean, yeah, it's important music, isn't it? When it touches something inside you, it's amazing," Liam says but it's almost like he's asking a question.

"I know what you mean," Harry murmurs and when Liam turns to smile at him, Harry can't help but to grin back, this time not paying attention to whether his dimples make an appearance or not. "If what you're singing about doesn't affect the person listening, then what's the point?"

"Exactly," Liam nods animatedly and Harry's about to speak again when someone appears at his elbow.

"Hey Liam."

Harry figures this must be Zayn, this ridiculously beautiful man with dark hair and almond-shaped eyes, with gorgeous cheekbones that Louis seems to be hypnotised by.

"Zayn! Hey, meet Harry and Louis," Liam says excitedly and reaches out to grab Zayn's hand to move him closer. Harry's eyebrows rise. "We were just talking about music."

"Oh yeah?" Zayn looks up and blinks as he takes in Liam's new friends. To Harry's amusement, the recognition is instantaneous, but instead of being a music snob, which he'd expect considering Zayn's job, the bar they're currently in and the fact that Harry and Louis make up two thirds of One Direction, Zayn just reaches out to shake their hands and says nothing.

"Yeah, like how music should affect its audience, right Harry?" Liam leans forward towards Harry and he feels a little lightheaded.

Zayn, to his credit, covers his smile, but Louis sees and he throws his head back and laughs. "Okay, Zayn, music critic, tell us what you really thought about the last One Direction album."

Harry's expecting the usual praise and flattery that they get face-to-face.

"Bit rubbish, if you really want to know," Zayn says and Harry blinks before he starts to laugh in surprise. "Nowhere near as good as their early stuff. But the new album sounds more promising."

Now that has Harry choking on his laughter before he just stares at Zayn. He knows Louis is doing the same.

"You heard our early stuff?" Harry asks in disbelief. _No one_ has heard their early stuff.

"Saw you play once in a club down the street from here, actually," Zayn says with a shrug. "When Louis played drums and Niall played guitar. Before you ditched the instruments and picked up some dance moves."

"Saying we picked them up is a bit of an overstatement mate," Louis replies with a quick grin.

"Wait," Liam interjects, his eyes wide as he stares at Harry. "You're One Direction?"

Harry's answering smile is a little lopsided and a lot rueful.

"Oh my god," Liam stammers as his cheeks flush and his glance at Zayn is adorably horrified. "I just ran into you and then practically forced a drink on you. Oh my god you probably thought I was some groupie trying to ... oh god."

Louis just laughs in delight while Harry smiles reluctantly at how stupidly endearing Liam is, despite his extremely accurate description of what Harry had indeed been thinking.

"I leave you alone for five minutes and you try to pick up a member of One Direction," Zayn teases.

"No! No I wasn't, seriously I didn't know you were ...," Liam's face is flushed and Harry can't help but be incredibly charmed at Liam's embarrassment and the inarguable fact that Liam didn't have a clue who they were but still wanted to talk to them.

He lifts his hand and places it gently on Liam's arm, squeezing his bicep gently and trying not to notice the surprisingly muscular, defined feel of it under Liam's shirt. "Liam, it's fine. Really. It was nice to talk to someone who didn't know who we were. And I didn't think you were hitting on me, really."

Except that Harry kind of wishes Liam had been hitting on him. The longer they stood here talking, the more beautiful he thought Liam was and he really wanted to get to know him better but he was painfully aware that they'd have to leave soon to be ready for their interviews in the morning.

"Harry always thinks someone's hitting on him, so it's good for his ego if you weren't," Louis says cheerfully with a well-aimed elbow to Harry's ribs, which has him bending over slightly with a pained wince. "Give me your phone, Liam."

Liam digs it out of his pocket and hands it over as he watches Harry in consternation. "Hey, you okay?"

"Oh he's fine, we do this all the time," Louis says casually, brushing off Liam's concerns. "Okay, I've put my number in your phone and I've dialled my number, so I'll have yours. We'll arrange a night out, yeah? Strictly off the record though."

"Yeah, course," Zayn says as if it's a given, which makes Harry want to trust him, even if he's not quite there yet.

"That sounds amazing," Liam says, rocking back on his heels and glancing between Louis and Harry with that crinkly-eyed smile of his that has Harry catching his breath.

"I'll text you later," Louis says, reaching out to pat Liam's arm. "We'll bring Niall. You'll love him. He'll love you."

Harry pretends that he doesn't have a vicious urge to shove Louis' hand away.

"It was really nice to meet you both," Louis adds, smiling up at Liam before turning to Zayn. "Man, I really just want to ruffle your perfect hair."

"I wouldn't touch the hair if I were you," Liam warns, his eyes lighting up in amusement. "Zayn's very particular about it, aren't you?"

Liam reaches up as if to carry out Louis' deepest wish and touch Zayn's hair, but Zayn throws up an arm and pushes a laughing Liam away.

"Okay, I'll resist until you know me better," Louis concedes. Harry looks down at his friend and sees the familiar lovestruck expression he's seen a million times before on Louis' face as he looks at Zayn. While Harry is inexplicably relieved that Louis' interest doesn't lie with Liam - and really there's no reason why it shouldn't because Liam is lovely and sweet, with a body that Harry is stupidly distracted by and kind of desperate to discover, not to mention that absurdly gorgeous face of his - he knows Louis falls in and out of love twice a week at a drop of a hat.

"I promise I won't let him touch your hair," Harry offers to Zayn as he holds out his hand again for Zayn to shake warily as his other hand lifts as if to defend his hair from a sneak attack. Harry thinks it bodes well for Zayn's future friendship with no-boundaries Louis.

He turns to Liam and offers him a smile. "Thanks for the drink, Liam."

"Oh, no worries," Liam flushes. "I'm really sorry I ran into you, you know. But it was kind of brilliant because otherwise we wouldn't have met."

Harry's eyebrows raise as he tries to figure out if Liam's flirting or if he is just the most sincere and honest person he's ever met. While he almost hopes he's flirting, he's beginning to suspect that Liam is one of those rare, beautiful people, untouched by the big bad world that Harry barely remembers anymore. "Yeah, I'm glad you did," Harry murmurs quietly so only Liam can hear him. "We'll see you soon."

He drags Louis away from staring at Zayn's cheekbones and the crowd swallow them up as they head to where Niall was last seen.

Harry allows himself one glance back. Liam's smiling that crinkly-eyed smile at him and Harry feels a warm glow spread though his body as he returns the smile, lifting his hand in a half-wave before forcing himself to look away.

Louis spots Niall and they spend ten minutes pulling him away from the girl he's with before they're outside, heads habitually bent down to avoid eye contact and recognition. They don't speak until they're back at Harry's flat. Niall and Louis fall onto the sofas as Harry pads into the kitchen to grab three beers from the fridge, appreciating the cold bottles after an evening of warm beer and hands them to the boys before falling into his armchair and closing his eyes.

"Nice lads, weren't they?" Louis says, interrupting Harry's solitude.

"Yeah," Harry agrees, unwilling for reasons he doesn't want to explain to expand on that answer as he remembers beautiful brown eyes smiling at him.

"Who's that then?" Niall asks lazily. "You get lucky?"

"No," Louis says and Harry hears the hint of annoyance in his voice. Harry's pretty sure Louis' fallen desperately in love with Zayn, and he can't exactly blame him. "Liam and Zayn. Liam ran into Harry apparently and bought him a drink to say sorry. Didn't even know who Harry was until Zayn, a music critic and his mate or boyfriend, I couldn't really tell, told him. Liam loves music like Harry loves music and Zayn is probably the most stunningly good-looking man I've ever met in my life."

Niall makes a sound like he's offended.

"Well apart from you of course Nialler," Louis soothes and Harry watches in amusement as Louis tugs Niall into his body and strokes his hair. His amusement grows as Niall leans into Louis and practically purrs into him, nudging his head closer. "We said we'd meet up, get to know each other properly."

"Louis means he wants to find out if he's got a chance of getting in Zayn's bed," Harry interprets and he and Niall share a knowing grin.

"Well one of us had to make a move if you ever wanted to see Liam again," Louis teases gently.

Harry's immediately response is to close up, his face schooled into that blank look he's mastered in recent months and a careless tap of his fingers against the nearest surface, which means his knees on this occasion.

"Oh, so you both have crushes," Niall crows, sitting up a little straighter to glance between his mates.

"I don't have a crush," Harry says quietly. "But he was nice. Like, the nicest person in the world. It was a bit disconcerting because he's so freaking nice that it seems like an act, but I think he's just really nice, you know?"

"Not really," Niall frowns. He glances at Louis for an explanation.

"Seriously, he's a goddamn sweetheart," Louis confirms. "Not Harry's type at all."

Harry winces at the offhand comment but he can't exactly disagree. He's had a terrible track record since they've been famous, like properly famous, and he's been used and fucked over more times than any of them care to recall.

"Which is why I don't have a crush," Harry says lightly, pushing aside thoughts of Liam's muscular arms and his beautiful, kissable lips.

"Text them now," Niall pleads. "I want to meet gorgeous Zayn and sweet Liam. Pleeeease Louis, please please please!"

"Fine," Louis huffs but Harry knows he's secretly pleased. This way he can blame his eager texting (and really it's barely been an hour since they left the bar) on Niall.

**Let's do something tomorrow night. Niall wants to meet you. Louis (the cute one from the bar) x**

Harry just rolls his eyes and gets up to get more beer because he absolutely isn't anxious for Liam's response.

"He says Zayn has to go see some band at what sounds like a complete dive tomorrow, wants to know if we can want to come along," Louis yells as Harry walks back into the room and distributes the beer.

"Oh shit, he's adorable by text," Niall mutters, his eyes curious as he hands Louis' phone over to Harry to show him.

**Zayn has 2 c sum band 2moz at Jakes on Old Street. Can you come? We realy want u2! Was soooo nice 2 meet u! Pls come? Only if ur freeeee! x**

Harry feels his heart sink, because maybe Louis' right. He may just have a small, tiny crush on sweet Liam. And he really doesn't know how to feel about that, except that it's probably not a good thing for any of them, really.

****

Usually after a heavy work day, Harry just wants to go home and crawl into bed, shutting out the world and crashing into oblivion. But tonight he's dragging Louis and Niall along, trying to hurry them up as he spots the sign that indicates they've almost reached their destination. Harry's running on empty at this point, after a gruelling interview session followed by laying down two vocal tracks that hopefully the engineer will be able to do something with before they're next due in, two days from now. Tomorrow is a leisure day, much to all their relief because it's been a long week, so if they can just stay awake, they can be up as late as they like.

"Come on," Harry mutters as he reaches for the door and steps inside, immediately in love with the dark wooden decor and trashy photographs on the walls. He's looking around as he heads towards the bar but he can't see Liam. Or Zayn.

"Nice place," Niall approves as he catches the eye of the bartender and orders a round. "What should I get the boys?"

"Same I reckon," Louis says thoughtfully as he takes in the very empty bar and the band setting up on the very small stage opposite them. "Should be cosy."

Harry takes a sip of his beer and sends silent thanks for being better than last night's.

His gaze lifts as the door opens and he spies Zayn first, being pushed by Liam who is bouncing behind him, clearly trying to get him to hurry up. Harry can't prevent the smile from lifting his lips as he catches Liam's eye and sees his face light up.

"Hey!" Liam calls, abandoning Zayn by the door and rushing forward to greet them. "You made it!"

"Of course we did," Louis says, clapping Liam on the back. "Did you think we wouldn't?"

"Well," Liam pauses and bites his lip absently. It draws Harry's gaze down and he feels his stomach clench before he forces his gaze back up. "I know you're probably really busy so I wasn't sure. I thought maybe you'd have a better offer or something than to sit here with me and Zayn and watch a band that may or may not be terrible."

"Can't think of a more perfect way to spend my evening," Louis reassures him before stepping forward to speak to Zayn.

"Hi," Harry says quietly as Liam looks up at him and smiles before glancing away. "This is Niall. He's been dying to meet you."

"To meet me?" Liam asks in genuine surprise as he turns to hold his hand out politely to Niall, who just laughs loudly and yanks Liam into a bear hug.

"Yes you," Niall says as he releases a bemused Liam. "The lads were telling me all about you last night and I couldn't wait to meet you and this gorgeous Zayn, who I assume is the poor lad Louis has accosted over there, right?"

"Yeah," Liam says a little breathlessly as Niall heads in their direction. "Niall Horan from One Direction couldn't wait to meet me?"

"Yeah," Harry says with a genuine smile at Liam's confusion. "Why wouldn't he?"

"Because I'm just me," Liam says, holding out his hands as if to indicate himself. "And you three are amazing."

"Just because we're famous, doesn't mean we're automatically brilliant people, Liam," Harry says quietly because it's a fundamental truth he's become well-acquainted with over the past two years.

"Well no, of course not," Liam says, with a frown as he moves closer to Harry and takes a seat on Niall's vacated stool. "But when we met yesterday, you were brilliant then. And so was Louis. I just assumed Niall would be brilliant as well, and I'm pretty sure he is. Right?"

Harry ruthless pushes down the fluttering in his chest. "Yeah, he's brilliant."

"Well then," Liam says happily. "You're all brilliant and you're here, which is ..."

"Brilliant?" Harry supplies with a teasing smile.

"Yeah, it's brilliant," Liam echoes with a laugh.

"Drink your beer, Liam," Harry orders as he passes Liam's drink over. "It's brilliant."

Liam flushes as he sips at his beer. "Busy day?"

"Yeah," Harry sighs as he leans back against the bar and watches the band introduce themselves. He can see Zayn watching the band while he deflects whatever nonsense Niall and Louis are spouting at him. As the band start strumming into their first song, Harry turns to look at Liam, who's also watching the band, a smile playing on his lips. "Lots of interviews and then in the studio for some recording."

Liam glances over at him and smiles sympathetically. "I bet you're tired of answering the same questions over and over."

Harry's lips twist into a wry smile. "Yeah, it can get a little boring. Louis is the worst, he can't even pretend anymore to care about answering them."

"But you do," Liam guesses.

"One of us has to," Harry says as he shrugs his shoulders. "The fans will probably only see one of the interviews, so every time we have to look as if it's the first time we've ever been asked about the new album or our fans or our love lives."

Liam doesn't answer but Harry feels a hand on his arm and he looks up in surprise to see Liam smiling at him, almost like they're sharing a secret. He feels surprisingly comforted.

"My round," Liam murmurs as he lets go of Harry and turns to face the bar. Harry's eyes drift back to where Liam's hand had rested on his arm and he rubs the area gently, his mind whirling but mostly focusing on one thing. He definitely has a crush.

"So what do you do, Liam?" Harry asks as he spins around on his stool and puts his empty glass on the bar.

"I teach," Liam says, turning around to face Harry. "It's only my second year but I love it."

"What do you teach?" Harry thinks Liam's probably an excellent teacher, one who really takes an interest in each and every child, from what he knows of Liam already.

"Gym," Liam pulls a face as Harry laughs at him. "And I cover some music lessons."

"Should have known you were the physical type," Harry murmurs, remembering the feel of Liam's bicep under his hand. "I bet you love getting all dirty and sweaty. I hated gym."

Liam laughs again. "Getting dirty and sweaty is the best part!"

Harry's breathing hitches as he blinks up at Liam, trying to work out if Liam's flirting or not.

"Never have truer words been spoken," Louis says as he slings his arms around Liam and Harry and his head appears between them. "We're talking about sex, right?"

"Liam's a gym teacher," Harry explains as he hands Louis his beer. "Liam's round."

"Excellent, cheers mate," Louis says as he lowers his arms to grab the glass. "You teach gym? How disgustingly healthy of you."

"And music on the side," Harry adds.

"You sing?" Louis pauses to look at Liam excitedly. "Please tell me you sing!"

"Not very well," Liam says sheepishly. "I can teach others to sing though."

"Great, perhaps you can give Harold here a few breathing tips because he's always running out of breath by the final verse."

"Screw you," Harry says good-naturedly because this is a longstanding joke between them. "At least I have the stamina to get to the end of a concert without being winded."

"That's because I have to basically carry the show by myself because you two can't hit a high note to save your lives," Louis argues, winking at Liam before turning back to Harry with what appears to be a legitimately angry expression.

"You're such a brat," Harry grumbles as he takes another sip.

"Thoughts, Liam?" Louis turns to Liam questioningly.

"Your voice is kind of angelic and ethereal and sits nicely over Harry's, which is more whiskey and long, dark, lonely nights," Liam says absently as he taps his hand on the bar in time with the band.

Harry exchanges a glance with Louis and they both turn to stare at Liam, who finally realises that he's being studied and flushes. "Sorry, did I say something wrong?"

"No," Harry says quickly. "No, that was um, brilliant."

Liam's face lifts into that stupid crinkly-eyed smile that has Harry's heart beating faster. He decides that he's going to make it his mission to see that smile appear as often as possible. "Brilliant," Liam murmurs softly.

It turns out that the band are actually quite good, and Harry makes a mental note to keep track of their career and maybe make a few well-placed comments about them in interviews or on Twitter. By the time they leave the bar, Harry knows Liam's surname, where he went to college, that he shares an apartment with Zayn five blocks from his place and he has two sisters. He also knows that he likes Liam far more than he should and that it's still a bad idea to entertain anything other than friendship with him. Even if he does stare at Liam's lips a lot. And he spent a good ten minutes fantasising about kissing Liam and running his hands up and down those muscular arms of his that have driving Harry mad because he knows they're there, hidden under Liam's long-sleeved shirts.

He also knows, by the time he gets home, that Louis has a major crush on Zayn and unlike Harry, Louis' not afraid to let people know about it. Sometimes Harry wishes he could go back to the days when he was more open and honest about his feelings, but he'd been burned too many times and sometimes in the most public of ways and he can't just forget about them. Even if Liam makes him want to.

***

Louis invites Zayn and Liam to their next gig, which so happens to be a quiet, acoustic set in a moody club. Harry and the boys insist on doing one of these gigs at least once a month as a way to blow off steam and remind themselves that it's not all screaming girls and bubblegum pop. Liam's excited response makes them all smile.

Harry gets more nervous before these gigs than he does performing to thousands of fans arenas. There's something about intimate gigs, where you can look each member of the audience in the eye and see what they're thinking, whether they're listening to you or bored, whether they're wondering what the hell these boys from One Direction are doing in a rundown bar playing for a handful of patrons or whether they're wondering if they can get another round in before heading home. Not to mention they play more of their old stuff at these gigs with a few new songs and a cover or two, so it feels more important somehow. More like the real them.

He's pacing around in their room backstage, Louis and Niall having long since disappeared to leave Harry to his own demons as they'd been together long enough to know it was better to just let Harry sort his own head out, when Liam's head pops round the door.

"Hey," Liam's voice filters through the panic in Harry's foggy mind and he turns slowly to see Liam's worried face. "The guys said it was okay to come back here and say hi, wish you luck."

Harry just stares at him. He can feel the panic starting to take over as he realises that one of the faces he'll be looking at, one of the faces he can read all the thoughts of, will be Liam.

"Is it not okay? Should I go?" Liam stutters a little, looking apprehensive. "I'll just go. Sorry. God I'm really sorry, I shouldn't have come back here."

"Wait," Harry manages to get the word out through his dry mouth.

Liam pauses, and Harry wonders what he sees as he looks at Harry.

"Um," Liam bites his lip before his head disappears and then he's walking into the room, closing the door behind him and heading straight for Harry, grabbing his hands which had been hanging loosely, uselessly at his sides. "It's just nerves, yeah? You're nervous?"

Harry nods, feeling completely inadequate and hopeless. He's supposed to be one of the biggest popstars in the world and here he is, in some unknown bar, freaking out like always because he's worried that he's going to fall apart, that the audience will realise that he's not anything special, that he's going to fail.

"The first day I had to teach a class, I was so nervous that I tipped my coffee all over my notes and the lesson plan I'd been working on all weekend, even though it mostly consisted of the rules of basketball, which I've known since I was six and could recite in my sleep," Liam says softly with a self-deprecating smile. Harry's captivated. "When the kids strolled in, most of them looking bored or defensive, a million thoughts went rushing through my mind about how I couldn't do this and they were all relying on me but I couldn't cope with the responsibility of it all. Then a kid came in and he tripped over his own feet. I wanted to run over and help him up but I held back and only one of the other kids in the class helped him up, while the rest of them laughed. So my first words as a teacher were, 'Anyone who didn't trip up or help someone who tripped over in this lesson, anyone who laughed, can do suicides until I say stop.' And the nerves disappeared because I then had to teach thirty kids who hated me on the spot. So anyway, what I'm saying is, it could be worse."

"Did you manage to win them over in the end?" Harry asks after a pause because Liam's story is so flipping adorable that Harry got lost in imagining Liam in that gym, being both sweet and strict and it's doing crazy things to his pulse.

"Eventually," Liam grins. "But you'll have this audience loving you within two minutes, I'd bet my comic collection on it."

"You have a comic collection?" Harry asks in surprise because he'd been picturing Liam as more of a jock than a nerd.

"Yeah," Liam says sheepishly. "I know, it's nerdy but I love them."

"It's cool," Harry says, and really it is because Harry has a sneaking suspicion that he'd find anything Liam likes to be cool and interesting.

"Feeling better?"

Harry realises with a start that he does feel loads better. The nerves have subsided and as he glances at his watch, he only has five more minutes before he gets on stage. "Hey, you distracted me."

"Mission accomplished then," Liam says as he squeezes Harry's hands.

"Hey Liam?" Harry asks, and something in his voice must be the cause of Liam's questioning frown. "What if I'm the kid who trips over?"

"Then I'll help you up," Liam says as if the answer is obvious. "I'll see you out there, yeah? I'll be the one with a Harry Styles fanclub badge. Zayn's wearing Louis Tomlinson and Niall Horan badges and he pretends it's under duress, but we both know better, right?"

Harry just nods, completely speechless as Liam lets go of his hands, gives him that crinkly-eyed smile and heads out the door, leaving Harry to stare after him.

He is so very, very screwed.

When he steps onto the stage, he's calmer than he's ever been before a show and as he takes his seat on the stool in the middle of the small stage, waiting for Louis to settle himself on the drums and Niall to make sure his guitar is tuned perfectly. He reaches up for the microphone and shifts so it's at the height he likes it, before introducing themselves quietly. His eyes are searching the crowd, touching each person he meets until his gaze rests on Liam in a booth near the back. He knows Zayn's sitting next to him, but his eyes lock on Liam and don't move as he hums his way into their first song. He gets through the first verse before he finally looks away and focuses on the rest of the audience and he can see that it's going to be a well-received set tonight as feet are tapping and everyone is silently listening to them.

Throughout the set, Harry's gaze flicks back to Liam over and over again, and each time Liam's focused on him, nodding along, smiling as if in encouragement or support, and each time Harry's lips lift into an answering smile before his gaze travels on. He knows Zayn is dying to review them, but they made an agreement that this first time, he was just a guest, a spectator to enjoy (or not) the music.

When they say their goodbyes, it's to rapturous applause, mostly led by Liam and Zayn, much to their amusement on stage and they run off, clapping each other on the back and whistling happily as they quickly change, throw their stuff into organised chaos at the guy management had hired to arrange their equipment to be moved around and they head out to the bar.

Liam's hugging Harry tightly before Harry even sees him and he allows himself this. He allows himself to enjoy the feel of Liam's arms wrapped snugly around him, pressing their bodies together so that Harry can confirm that Liam's body is as firm and hard as his arms. He allows himself to enjoy the tickling sensation that Liam's breathing against his neck is causing and he allows himself to feel recklessly happy before Liam's wrenched away from him by an exuberant Louis and Harry finds himself in a Niall and Zayn sandwich.

"Ask me what I think of One Direction's latest gig," Zayn whispers in his ear.

Harry looks up questioningly but silent.

Rolling his eyes, Zayn laughs up at him. "An excellent set, with haunting lyrics and smoky tunes which suit Styles' range perfectly as his voice blends harmoniously with Horan and Tomlinson, making even the most resistant critic fall hopelessly in love with this perfectly tuned trio."

"You wrote us a review? In your head?" Louis leans over Liam to stare at Zayn. "Fuck. You should write that. Harry? Yes? He can post that on his stupid bloggy thing?"

"My blog isn't stupid," Zayn bristles but he finds himself laughing as Louis shoves him back into the booth and curls up next to him. "I'll write it for the next gig."

"My round," Liam says as he shoves Niall towards the booth and heads to the bar. Harry can't seem to stop his feet from following him.

"Surely it's my round by now," Harry says with a smile as he pushes Liam's hand away from his wallet.

"Oh no, it's definitely mine," Liam assures him with a grin. "You deserve it after that amazing set."

"You liked it?" Harry asks, shoving a hand into his hair and pushing it back, letting it fall where it likes. "Don't just be polite, though. Be honest."

"Okay," Liam says agreeably as he orders a round. He turns back to Harry and gives him a considering look. "Why do you always assume people aren't being honest with you?"

"Because they usually aren't," Harry says simply.

Harry's surprised to find Liam tugging him closer until Liam's arm is around Harry's shoulder and Harry lets his head drop onto Liam's broad shoulder.

"That's the saddest thing I've ever heard," Liam murmurs and Harry silently agrees, yet it's just a part of his life now. "You won't believe me, but I'll always be honest with you. Whatever I say, I'll mean it."

Harry shifts so he can lift his arm around Liam's back and he throws caution to the wind by letting his other arm lift to wrap around his waist so he's hugging Liam - well, more like clinging to him - and he buries his head into his shoulder. "I want to believe you."

"Well, we're halfway there then aren't we?" Liam says quietly.

After a minute or so, Harry moves back out of Liam's space and throws him a wry smile. "Sorry. Feeling a bit emotional after that performance I guess."

"Feeling better now?" Liam asks as he hands Harry two of the drinks and balances the other three in his own.

"Yeah, thanks Liam."

"Anytime," Liam offers before they head back to the booth and they squeeze in next to Niall.

It's the first night Harry dreams of Liam and wakes up in the middle of the night, shaking and rock-hard.

***

The three of them are just finishing another gruelling day in the studio when Harry sees Niall frowning at his phone.

"What's up Nialler?" Harry asks as he flops onto the chair next to him. "Girl turned you down?"

"No but Liam has," Niall says grumpily.

"Liam? Up for anything, go with the flow Liam Payne?" Harry teases, although he's actually as surprised as Niall. Since they met last week, they've seen Zayn and Liam more than not, and he knows Niall and Louis have been texting both of them nonstop, whenever they have a break in the studio or when they're crashed at Harry's or Louis' and something funny happens that they just have to text the guys about.

Harry hasn't texted Liam once, although Louis programmed their numbers into his phone last week. He thinks it's best to keep a little perspective on this crush he has on Liam and not bombarding him with texts is one way that he keeps himself in check. He lives vicariously through the hilarious and sometimes unintentionally-hilarious texts Liam sends to Niall and Louis.

"Invited him and Zayn to come bowling tonight with us," Niall says with a frown. "Zayn's coming but Liam says he's got work to do or something."

"He'll probably come out tomorrow night, Niall," Harry reasons, although he feels stupidly disappointed that Liam won't be there. It scares him how quickly he's falling for Liam and his earnest face and honest responses and crinkly-eyed smile. Perhaps it will do him good to not see Liam for a night. And honestly, it's just one night.

Halfway through their bowling night, Harry's sulking at the bar and checking his phone, although of course there isn't a text from Liam waiting for him because he doesn't text Liam and he's not sure Liam even has his number. He's been smiling and chatting with the guys all evening, because really he does love Louis and Niall, and Zayn is pretty cool and they get on well, but he just misses Liam and his dorky smile. He's pretty sure Liam would be as competitive as the rest of them, if not more, and if Liam was here, Harry would be amusedly watching Liam and Louis try to outdo each other while Liam teases Niall about the girl he's flirting with in the next lane who clearly recognises them but is playing it cool, much to Niall's delight.

But Liam isn't here and Harry is sulking because it's just not as fun.

He finishes his drink before picking up his phone and sending a text to Liam before he can change his mind.

**You suck and we miss you. Free tomorrow to come watch stupid movies at mine and throw popcorn at Louis and Zayn? Harry**

He throws his phone down and orders another round. When his phone buzzes 30 seconds later, he fumbles in his eagerness as he tries to pick it up and read the text.

**I figured as Lou and Niall have been sending me abusvie txts all nite! Wat shud I bring tomorow? :-)**

Harry pretends that he's not grinning inanely as he types out a response.

**Just you (and maybe Zayn) .xx**

**Looking foward to it!!!! :-) xx**

Of course he is, Harry thinks to himself. Liam looks forward to everything because he's just a big bundle of joy.

When Harry joins them back at the lane, he's much happier and spends the rest of the night trying to flatten Zayn's quiff, much to his annoyance and Harry's amusement.

***

If Harry spends over an hour tidying and cleaning his place before the guys are due round, then it has nothing to do with the fact that Liam is coming round to his for the first time. And if Harry fusses over the food he's laid out, that has nothing to do with wanting to impress Liam either.

And if Harry jumps a mile when his doorbell goes and his heart starts racing, that absolutely has nothing to do with Liam being on the other side of his front door.

He forces himself to take a deep breath before he opens the door, only to step back as three lads push through, each one grabbing Harry for a welcome hug and heading for the lounge before Liam steps in and shuts the door behind him, looking around at Harry's hall as if it's the greatest apartment he's ever seen.

"Cool place," Liam says half a second before Harry grabs him for a hug and if Harry holds him a little tighter and lets his hand linger on Liam's neck a little longer than he should, then it's just because he hasn't seen Liam in two days and he's missed him a little.

When he steps back, he grabs Liam's hand and tugs him into the lounge where he falls into the armchair and Harry plays host for five minutes, getting drinks and bringing in food while Louis sorts out the movie. When Harry hands Liam the popcorn, Liam crinkly-eyes him before miming throwing it at Louis and Harry laughs because Liam is hilarious.

They mostly chat during the movie, Louis and Zayn flirting on one sofa while Harry and Niall tell Liam about their new album and funny stories from their last tour, which Liam seems to be fascinated by.

"Touring with your best mates sounds like so much fun," Liam says wistfully.

"Who said I was touring with my best mates?" Niall asks and smirks as Harry smacks him around the head.

"Yeah, I'd have no idea Liam because I have to tour with these two idiots," Harry says as he and Niall start play-fighting and Liam just laughs at them.

"You're lucky you get to tour with us, mate, because you don't have any other friends," Louis chips in.

"I could go on tour with Liam and Zayn," Harry's voice is muffled as Niall is currently sitting on him and trying to smother him with a cushion. "They're my friends."

"Nah mate, Zayn's my mate and Liam's Niall's mate, neither of them like you at all," Louis responds. "Right guys?"

"I'm too lazy to go on tour," is all Zayn says. "I can barely get to the shops."

Liam stands up and stretches out before he grabs Niall and starts tickling him, forcing him to wriggle in response and he drops the cushion, forgetting to smother Harry as he tries to get away from Liam.

Harry sits up and shakes his hair back into place, grinning absurdly as he watches Niall fall to the floor, crying with laughter before Liam lets go and falls onto the sofa next to Harry and reaches around him to bring Harry into his body, running his hand over Harry's hair. Harry has to stop himself from purring in delight.

"I'm mates with all of you," Liam says loyally as Niall scrambles to his feet and sinks into the armchair, grinning.

Harry's barely breathing, afraid to move in case Liam pushes him away or gets up and moves away. But when Niall puts another movie on and Liam's still got his arm around Harry and his hand is in fact stroking his arm slowly, almost absently, Harry relaxes and snuggles in a little closer.

He stays there for the entire movie, even though his neck is a little cramped and his right arm went to sleep about 40 minutes ago.

***

It happens again. Louis throws his phone down and glares at it between management meetings.

"Okay, Tommo?" Harry asks, looking up from his own phone where he'd been checking his Twitter feed and answering random questions from fans.

"Liam says he can't come to our gig tomorrow night," Louis says huffily. "Says he's got something on."

"Maybe he has," Harry says with a frown. "Perhaps we've just been monopolising his time for the past two weeks. I'm sure he has other friends and other interests." Harry hates that thought. Hates it passionately.

"He's not allowed other friends!" Louis says loudly and obnoxiously.

Harry agrees silently.

"You text him," Louis says, leaning forward. "You two get on the best. He'll come if you ask."

"I really don't think me asking will make a difference," Harry says slowly, even if he's pleased by Louis' assessment.

He picks up his phone anyway.

**Louis says you can't come to our gig tomorrow :-( .xx**

It doesn't take long for Liam to respond.

**I'm so sorreeeee! I reeeeally wanna come but im busy :-( xx**

Frowning, Harry shows the text to Louis who just throws his hands in the air and storms off.

**We'll miss you :-( What if I get nervous again? Who's going to calm me down? .xx**

Liam's response is immediate.

**I'm sorreeee! U can call me if u want b4 u go on? Sorreeee xx**

The gig doesn't go as well as the last one they did, and Harry has a horrible feeling that he knows why. His nerves are present, as usual, but they slowly disappear during the first few songs. But his gaze is searching the entire time, never resting on any particular audience member because none of them are Liam. He gets more and more tense until they're finishing the last song and rushing offstage. There's no hugs or backslapping like last time because Louis and Niall are as aware as Harry that something was a bit off tonight. Not anything the audience would notice, hopefully, but something wasn't clicking like it usually does.

Harry's on his phone as soon as they're done.

**We missed you tonight. Wasn't the same without you .xx**

He waits but there's no response. Frowning, he wonders what exactly it was that Liam was busy doing tonight. Whatever it was, it clearly involved not being contactable. And Harry adds that to his list as to why tonight was so crappy.

He heads off home soon after, annoyed with himself for caring so much about Liam's absence and how it's starting to affect his performance. He crawls into bed, staring up at the ceiling as he pictures how tonight could have gone, in his perfect world scenario. Liam would be there, obviously, cheering and smiling as the boys rocked the venue. Then Harry would come out after and he'd run at Liam, who'd catch him in those arms of his that Harry absolutely didn't have an obsession with and they'd kiss.

God he's driving himself crazy with his fantasy Liam kisses. Since that first night he'd dreamt of Liam, it's become a regular dream. Him and Liam kissing in bed, kissing on the sofa, kissing in bars and kissing against walls. The surroundings change each time but the kissing doesn't. The kissing is amazing and the kissing is what has Harry waking up each morning with a painfully hard cock and it's what he thinks of in the shower as he slowly wanks himself off.

It's kind of pitiful really. Except that it's hot and Harry can't seem to stop thinking about it.

He's half asleep when his phone buzzes.

**I feel awful. Im so sorry. Forgive me? Was it ok? xxxxxx**

**It wasn't our best. Make it up to me by having coffee with me tomorrow? .xx**

**Love 2! xxxxx (sorreeee)**

Harry falls asleep with a smile on his face.

***

Harry's anxiously tapping his foot against the table in the coffee shop as he warms his hands with his cappuccino. He's already bought Liam's vanilla latte, because he knows that's Liam's favourite. Harry's got his beanie pulled down as far as it will go, completely covering his curls and he keeps his eyes down, glancing up at the door each time the bell signals a new customer.

When Liam finally walks in, he rushes over and slips into the chair opposite Harry, breathing heavily.

"I'm so sorry! I got stuck in a meeting after school and ran the whole way," Liam pants, trying to catch his breath while lifting his puppy-dog eyes to Harry in apology.

Harry wonders how he does it. If he didn't know Liam and someone was trying to describe him to Harry, he'd think Liam was a mythical creature. No one could be this earnest, this thoughtful, this beautiful. Yet here he is, sitting across from Harry, completely oblivious to the fact that Harry is slowly falling for him.

"Liam, relax," Harry says, reaching across to pat his hand. Liam's hand turns automatically to lace his fingers with Harry and he squeezes gently. "I got you your favourite."

Liam glances down and his face falls a little. "Oh, I should have got the drinks. I was the one who let you down yesterday. This was going to be my treat."

"You are something else, Liam Payne," Harry murmurs with a smile as he pulls his hand away and wraps it around his drink in self-preservation. "Just drink your latte and enjoy it."

Liam sighs heavily before he takes a sip and smiles at Harry. "Thank you for my drink, Harry."

"You're welcome," Harry says with a grin. "Now, how was your day?"

Liam launches into a detailed analysis of how his classes were progressing and how he was finally getting through to one particular child who hated gym but Liam was working with him to help improve his stamina. Liam thought it was finally helping and Harry just watched him talk, enjoying how animated he got over a little game of catch with a school kid.

"So what about you? How bad was it last night?" Liam asks, staring at his drink.

"Liam, really it was okay. I was exaggerating," Harry says, waiting for Liam to look up before he smiled. "We just missed you, yeah?"

"I wish I could have been there," Liam admits with a little smile. "I really enjoy your gigs."

"We just like having you around," Harry tells him, partly because it's true and partly because he thinks Liam needs to hear it.

"I have no idea why," Liam admits with a cute little head duck. "I'm just me. Pretty boring, actually."

"Well I think you're brilliant," Harry teases and he laughs as Liam flushes at the shared joke. "Come on, bring your drink. Let's go meet the others and get drunk."

"Oh no, I can't," Liam's eyes widen and Harry thinks he sees a flash of panic in them. Frowning, Harry reaches out to grab Liam's restless hand tapping against the table.

"Hey, what's up?" Harry asks quietly. "And don't brush me off. Something's wrong."

Liam laughs a little nervously. Harry hates that laugh. "Harry, really. I just can't."

"I'm not leaving your side until you tell me what's wrong," Harry says moodily as he crosses his arms and glares at Liam.

Liam just stares at him for a while, probably trying to work out just how stubborn Harry can be, he thinks. Well, Liam doesn't know him well enough yet, probably thinks he's the most easygoing guy in the world because most of the time he is, but when he wants to be, he can be as stubborn as the next guy. When the next guy is Louis Tomlinson.

"I'm, uh, I don't really, um," Liam pauses, blinks hard and looks up at Harry with a fierce glare that has Harry sitting up, his arms dropping to his sides. "I'm a little broke, alright? I get paid next Tuesday and I'll be able to afford to go out again but right now I don't have any spare cash."

Harry kind of hates himself for pushing the point so hard that Liam had to confess to money issues, but he's relieved to know it's something so insignificant to their friendship that he can easily fix it.

"Fine, we'll buy your drinks, problem solved," Harry says lightly.

"No," Liam says firmly, this time crossing his own arms and almost daring Harry to fight him on this. Harry figures that Liam has his own stubborn side.

"Why not? We want you to come out with us," Harry wheedles. He's not above wheedling. "Let me buy you a few drinks."

"Absolutely not," Liam says, this time he's glaring at Harry. "I pay my own way or I don't go."

Harry gets it, he really does. And to be honest, if Liam was the kind of person who was okay with other people paying his way, then they wouldn't like him as much. _Harry_ wouldn't like him so much.

"Fine." Harry fishes his phone out of his pocket and types quickly before putting it on the table. "Sorted."

"What's sorted?" Liam asks, now looking completely miserable.

"Louis' flat. We're going there. Niall and Zayn will meet us there with alcohol. Problem solved," Harry says simply.

His phone buzzes and he glances at it before smiling at Liam. "That's Louis to say he adores the plan." His phone buzzes again. "That's Niall to ask whether we want beer or wine. The answer is always beer, by the way." His phone buzzes again. "That'll be Niall saying he's bringing beer whether we like it or not." His phone buzzes once more. "That'll be Zayn. It'll say 'Cool'."

Liam's laughing, although Harry can tell it's a reluctant laugh. He doesn't mind, he'll take it right now.

"So let's go to Louis' yeah?" Harry stands up, grabs his phone and tugs Liam up. He can feel his resistance, but Harry keeps pulling until he's got Liam outside and he slips his hand through Liam's arm and forces him to keep up. "Look, you can buy the alcohol next time, yeah? We just want to spend time with you so we'll work around whatever budget you have, okay? Stop being so damn noble, yeah?"

Liam grabs Harry's hand and holds it tightly all the way to Louis' house. Harry doesn't mind whatsoever.

Harry loves stepping into Louis' flat because it's the homeliest place he knows, aside from his Mum's home back in England.

"Hey," Harry greets Louis as he walks inside, dragging Liam with him. "Tell Liam he's being ridiculous and give us some beers."

"Liam, you're ridiculous," Louis says as he hands over two beers.

"Now sit here with me and let's get drunk," Harry says as he tugs Liam down onto one of Louis' enormous sofas and lays back, letting his legs rest on Liam's lap as he props his head against the arm rest high enough to drink his beer.

The night passes in a blur. Harry's been close to purring in contentment for the past two hours because Liam's been idly stroking and massaging his feet. He's watched Liam eventually relax and enjoy the evening.

It's just so easy to lie here with his friends, watching Louis and Zayn dance around each other, even though it's clear that Louis is half in love and Zayn is definitely interested. He and Liam have taken to nudging each other whenever they're close and rolling their eyes when they move away from each other. Niall is sprawled out on the floor, discussing his latest crush; the girl from bowling the other night. And it's very easy to lie down with Liam, where Harry can spin fantasies about Liam being his attentive boyfriend who dotes on him while Harry lets him, because he adores him as well.

"If it gets out that you like a girl who is clearly a fan, everyone will go mental and make your life hell," Louis says with a sigh. "And that'll make mine and Harry's lives hell because fans will think that we'll date them."

"Have you ever dated a fan?" Zayn asks, linking his fingers with Louis as they're slouched across the sofa together.

"Never," Louis says emphatically. "Helps that most of them are girls."

"Harry?" Zayn asks, raising his voice a little to carry across the room.

"Nope. Same," Harry waves towards Louis. "Niall's the one who likes fans on a personal, let me get to know you better level."

"I just like to think of it as keeping them on their toes," Niall laughs although he takes it back when two cushions come flying at him from Louis and Harry's direction. "I'm kidding!"

***

Harry's woken up by his phone ringing. Blearily opening his eyes, he feels around for his phone, finally finding it and answering without even checking who it is.

"Hey."

"It's too early Lou," Harry mumbles.

"Check Twitter. Check the internet. Check the morning paper."

"Fuck," Harry curses, his eyes opening and he's wide awake. "What'd they say?"

"You've been sleeping with two models at the same time," Louis says with a sigh. "Two Victoria Secrets models."

"Why can't they at least come up with something new?" Harry grumbles as he climbs out of bed and grabs his iPad, switching it on and loading up the first site he comes across. "Why do they always make stuff up that makes me look like a shit?"

"Because it sells papers and gets lots of hits," Louis says sadly. "Sorry mate."

"It is what it is," Harry says before ringing off. He calls management who apologise for not giving him forewarning and he makes demands to stop the tabloid stories. He's never pushed the sexuality thing because he's not been in a relationship for his entire boyband career but it's starting to annoy him more and more.

His phone goes off.

**Fucking wankers! Love ya bro!**

God he loves Niall.

He stays in, knowing that if he leaves the apartment, the paparazzi will find him. He spends an hour cleaning his apartment and another hour surfing the internet, avoiding Twitter and any other form of social media or news outlet.

He grabs his phone.

**Oi, come keep me company .xx**

Almost immediately, Liam replies.

**Be over in 10!!!!!!**

Grinning, Harry flicks his hair and waits.

Liam makes it in eight minutes. He ushers Liam in and shuts out the rest of the world.

"Sorry if you got hit with the paparazzi," he offers as he hits the kitchen and flicks the kettle on. "Tea?"

"Yeah, thanks," Liam says as he takes a seat at the table.

Harry busies himself with making tea before placing a mug in front of Liam and taking the seat opposite. He waits, but Liam just smiles at him over his cup.

"Last night was fun," Liam says finally. "I like Louis' flat. It's not as nice as this one of course."

Harry chuckles. "Liar."

"They're both nice in different ways," Liam amends with a cheeky smile that Harry falls in love with immediately.

"You're really not going to ask about the paps, are you?" Harry says finally with a reluctant laugh.

Liam shrugs. "I figure they appear now and again when you're famous."

Harry blinks, absolutely astonished. "Liam, have you looked at the internet today? Perhaps been on Twitter? Had a phone call from Louis or Niall?"

Looking a little abashed, Liam shrugs. "Maybe all three? Or four, if you count calls from Louis and Niall as two separate things."

"I do," Harry says with a little sigh. "Well?"

"Well what?" Liam asks, tilting his head and looking blankly at Harry.

"Don't you want to know if it's true?" Harry asks, a little exasperated.

"I'm pretty sure it's not true because you like men," Liam says slowly. "Right?"

"Right," Harry says just as slowly.

"And tabloids make stuff up, right?" Liam asks. "To pretend that you're straight?"

"Right," Harry repeats.

"And really, it's absolutely none of anyone's business even if you were sleeping with two gorgeous models, right?"

"Liam?" Harry says dazedly.

"Yes Harry?" Liam smiles across at him.

"You're pretty amazing," Harry says quietly. "Thanks for knocking me over that night and insisting on buying me a drink."

Liam flushes as he finishes his tea. "So what do you want to do today?"

 _Kiss you and get you naked and fuck on every surface in this apartment._ "Xbox?" Harry suggests innocently.

Harry's halfway through beating Liam at Call of Duty when Niall pops round. It quickly descends into anarchy when Zayn and Louis join them.

Liam nudges Harry when he spots Zayn whispering into Louis ear. Harry kicks Liam when Louis' hand grabs Zayn's.

"Oh come on lads, just admit it," Niall says finally when they're all but making out on the sofa.

They spring apart and stare at Niall, who just grins back at them. "Oh it's plain as day, you idiots. Just make out already."

Louis coughs delicately. "Actually, Niall, I'll have you know that Zayn and I have been making out for over a week now. Idiot."

Liam and Harry exchange a high-five.

"That's great," Liam says sincerely, his gaze fixed on Zayn as he gives him a happy smile. Zayn doesn't say anything, but he does nod at him.

"Just don't do anything disgusting on any surface I might touch, yeah?" Harry requests, reaching out to grab Louis' ankle and yanking him slightly.

"Too late, Harold," Louis says with a shrug.

"Oh that's disgusting," Harry groans.

"Hey, remember how you and Liam were sitting on that sofa yesterday?" Louis starts with an evil grin.

"Shut up!" Harry yells, covering his ears.

Zayn takes mercy on Harry and pulls Louis into a kiss.

Harry considers burning every article of clothing he wore last night. And possibly Liam's as well.

"So are you letting management know?" Niall asks as he blows Harry up onscreen.

"Not yet," Louis shrugs as he pulls away from Zayn. "Maybe in a few weeks. See how it goes."

"Yeah," Zayn agrees. "In the meantime, I'm going to write some scathing One Direction reviews to throw everyone off."

"Great," Harry says sarcastically. "Thanks a lot, Zayn."

"My pleasure," Zayn says with a grin. "If you want to release more of your early stuff, I might go a bit easier on you."

"Don't we all wish," Harry grumbles.

***

"I have no idea what I'm doing," Harry mutters as he tries his best to learn their new choreography.

"It's just a jump to the left," Niall calls from his left.

"And then a step to the riiiiiiiiight," Louis sings to his right.

"Fuck off, it's neither of those things," Harry growls in frustration. They've been trying to learn this routine all day and Harry cannot get his feet to move in the right direction. Mostly he's just been tripping himself up. And sometimes tripping Niall up.

He moves away and heads for his phone to check his messages. Perhaps Liam's sent him a text in the past hour that'll cheer him up.

He has, but it has Harry frowning.

**Heeeey! Can I ask a biiiiig favour? :-)**

Harry's heart drops.

Liam wants a favour.

Just when Harry had let his guard down, had thought that maybe Liam really was as perfect as he seemed. He wants a favour.

His bad mood gets a whole lot worse.

He wonders idly what the favour is. Perhaps Liam wants a new car, that's one favour he's been asked for before. Or maybe he wants Harry to give his management a demo, that's definitely one he gets a lot, and Liam does teach music on the side. Perhaps Liam has a friend who wants to be famous and wants to be seen in front of the paps with Harry. Perhaps _Liam_ wants to be papped with Harry. His personal favourite is when he gets asked to make a personal appearance, because it always makes _him_ look like the shitty popstar saying no, when really it's not his job to show up so a friend can get laid because Harry Styles turned up to a party slash event slash whatever.

Harry's so fucking mad, mostly at himself, that he grabs his phone and storms out of the rehearsal, heading home through the rain, hoping he'll cool off.

He _trusted_ Liam. He bought into the whole fucking act. Liam Payne, too proud to accept a handout or a drink that he can't repay. Too kind and considerate to ask about tabloid rumours. Too sweet to push himself on his new famous friends, always waits to be invited. Liam with his insistence that he didn't know who Harry and Louis were when they met, and Harry fucking _bought_ it.

He's so mad that he heads straight for his fridge when he gets in and necks a beer. Then another. And another. He's had six beers and his vision is blurry before he grabs his phone.

**I trusted you. Whatever favour you want, fine you can have it, but don't talk to me again.**

Harry throws his phone away, towards the lounge, and lets his head fall to his crossed arms on the table.

And waits for his heart to break.

He's woken up by incessant ringing. Lifting his head and wincing at the pain, he looks up and realises it's morning. And he's hungover. And he really wants to hate Liam Payne, except that he thinks he's at least half in love with him and that makes him the stupidest idiot this side of the Atlantic.

But the ringing continues.

Harry ignores it and considers looking for his phone, but he doesn't want to read Liam's attempts to deny his attempt to use Harry. But this time is worse because Harry was completely blindsided. He really believed Liam had been one of the good guys. And that makes it so much worse because in the past, he'd overlooked certain behaviour until it had become so obvious he was being used that Louis had forced him to step away and cease all contact. But this time, even Louis and Niall had been taken in.

Fucking doorbell.

Harry stalks to the front door and looks through the peephole to see a frustrated Louis and Niall standing outside. Louis' hand is resting against the doorbell.

Harry wrenches the door open with a growl. "Fuck off."

"Yeah, not gonna happen," Louis says as he shoves the door, sending Harry back into the apartment and steps inside, letting Niall shut the door behind them. Louis shoves Harry into the lounge and pushes him into the armchair as he takes a seat on the coffee table opposite him. "Niall, make tea."

Niall disappears for a few minutes and Louis just stares at Harry.

Harry stares at the floor, utterly miserable.

When Niall forces a mug into his hands, Harry takes it and sips.

"So," Louis starts and his voice has softened dramatically. "Liam called me last night."

"And?" Harry asks sarcastically, knowing what's coming, wishing he could avoid it. "Did he want a favour?"

"No, you idiot. You fucking idiot," Louis says in a fond voice with steel behind it. "He was freaking out. Babbling about you not wanting to see him again."

"Sounds about right," Harry says, bristling at Louis' insults. He's not wrong. He knows he's not wrong. He's been here before.

"Okay," Louis says, taking a deep breath before letting it out slowly. "I know you've been fucked over before. A lot. And management fucks you over and all your stupid not-friends fucked you over and those guys fucked you over. Liam fucking Payne, adorable, endearing, honest-to-God paragon, will not fuck you over. Now or ever."

Harry stares ahead, looking blank.

"Harry." Now it's Niall's turn as he takes a seat next to Louis. "We know you've been burned. But Liam isn't trying to sell you out or use you."

"Do you know how often I get asked for favours?" Harry says huskily and he blinks a couple of times to clear his vision. He so desperately wants to believe that Liam is different, he had believed _Liam_ was different. But the text is still sitting there on his phone. _Can I ask a biiiiig favour?_ A smiley face to soften the blow.

"Possibly not," Niall concedes as he reaches out to grab Harry's hand. Harry clings to it. "But we see a lot of it. We get a lot of it ourselves. But Liam is not one of those people, Harry. He's honestly not."

"You should speak to him," Louis says quietly. "Listen to what he wants."

"Do you know what he wants?" Harry asks, finally looking at Louis.

"No," Louis admits. "But it's Liam. I trust him."

"I can't," Harry whispers.

Niall pulls him forward into a hug that Louis embraces as well. They don't try to force the issue, just tuck Harry up between them and turn the television on low, watching pure rubbish all day while Harry just _hurts_.

He hurts while they go back to choreography lessons. He hurts when they record another song. He hurts through two radio interviews and he hurts every night when he curls up in bed and dreams about Liam. About who he thought Liam was.

He hurts so much that he doesn't pick up his phone for a week, until management force him to so that he can pick up their messages.

His phone has lain on the floor in his hallway for the past week. He's determinedly stepped over it countless times, refusing to look at it or acknowledge it. Sometime a few days ago, the battery had died and Harry had been relieved.

He picks it up tentatively and plugs it into the charger. He waits ten minutes before turning it on. Fifty one messages. Eight voicemails. He deletes all messages from management, deletes three from Louis from the night he flung his phone away. He responds to texts from his mum and Gemma. He opens the text he received from Zayn two days ago.

**Call me.**

Man of many words, Harry thinks and refuses to smile.

That leaves him with nine texts from Liam. He can't open them yet.

He listens to his voicemails, six are from management, yelling at him. One is from Niall, again from that night. He hears Liam's voice on the last and immediately switches off.

He calls Zayn.

"Alright," Zayn answers.

"It's me," Harry says, probably a little stupidly because Zayn has his number.

"You okay?" Zayn asks and Harry lets out a hiccup, because of course the first thing Zayn wants to know is if he's okay.

"Yeah, I guess. You asked me to call you," Harry says quietly.

"Mostly to make sure you're okay," Zayn says. "Louis said to just leave you alone until you came round."

"Yeah," Harry says because there isn't much else to say.

"So can I talk to you about Liam yet?" Zayn asks quietly.

Harry sighs. "Go on."

"You broke him," Zayn says flatly and it's the first time in this phone call that Harry can hear censure in Zayn's voice. He can hear the anger. "Fix him. Now."

Harry hears the dial tone that tells him Zayn's hung up on him.

He scrubs his face with his hands before he listens to Liam's voicemail.

_"Harry? Harry call me, okay? I need to talk to you, to explain. I've fucked up. Please call me. I can explain if you just let me. Please call me. Just ... call me, okay?"_

Harry slowly puts the phone on the table. He can hear a million things in Liam's voice. Panic. Hurt. Anger. Desperation.

He flicks through the texts from Liam.

**Harry please call meeeeeeeeeeeeee?**

**Im so sorry. Call me?**

**Harry please call me?**

**Please forgive me, im an idiot**

**Harry? Ru ok?**

**I miss u. Please call me, I can explain.**

**Fuck, just call me. Text me. Please**

**Please just let me explane, please Harry? Please?**

**Ok, i'll stop texting you. Im sorry. Im so sorry. I miss u.**

Harry wants to cry. He wants to believe Liam. He wants to so badly.

He picks up his phone once more, hand shaking.

**Come over?**

He gets response almost immediately.

**On my way!!!!!!!!!**

He almost smiles. Almost.

By the time the doorbell rings, Harry's worn a path in his hallway.

He takes a deep breath before opening the door.

Then he's knocked backwards, trying to catch his breath and stay upright as something hits him hard. He's winded, so it takes him a second to realise that he's been tackled, so to speak, by Liam. He's breathless because Liam's arms are around him and he's staggered back until he's pressed against the wall to keep them both upright.

"Liam?"

Eventually Liam lifts his head from Harry's shoulder and steps back, flushed. "Harry, I can explain everything. I swear, I can explain it."

Blinking, Harry rubs his hand across his face and looks at Liam. Really looks at him. He looks tired and perhaps a little skinnier. He still looks beautiful but he's lost that light he carries around, Harry thinks.

"Yeah, okay," Harry murmurs as he walks into the lounge and takes a seat on a sofa, indicating that Liam should sit next to him. "Explain."

"You remember that kid, the one I've been working with to help him in gym?" Liam starts and Harry frowns because he wasn't expecting Liam's explanation to start there. He nods slowly. "Two weeks ago, he got diagnosed with cancer. That's why he's been so tired in gym."

"That's awful, I'm so sorry," Harry says because Liam's stopped talking and he seems to be having difficulty speaking. It's the most natural thing in the world for Harry to reach out and place his hand over Liam's. Liam turns his hand so that it interlaces with Harry's and he squeezes it tightly.

"God, Harry, he's so young. He's so young and such a good kid," Liam says finally and his voice sounds thicker. "He really likes One Direction, except it's a secret because he thinks only girls are allowed to like them. He confessed it in a moment of weakness."

Harry feels sick. He can feel it right in his stomach. He wants to throw up.

"Harry ..." Liam looks up at him and Harry wants to lock himself in his room and never come out.

"Liam, your favour was to go see him, right? Give him a treat before he starts treatment?" Harry whispers and he stands up, letting go of Liam's hand and running for his bathroom. He sinks to the floor and retches.

"Harry?" Liam's at the door, falling to the floor and brushing his hair back. "I'm so sorry, I shouldn't have asked you. It was completely unfair of me."

"Liam," Harry laughs weakly and closes his eyes. He's not normally like this. He's normally the easygoing one, the sweet one, the one who would do anything for anyone. How did he become this untrusting person? "Stop apologising. Please stop apologising."

"Okay," Liam says soothingly as he keeps brushing Harry's hair back soothingly.

"Please stop," Harry says, his voice trembling. "Please stop being nice to me."

"Why?"

"Because I'm a horrible person," Harry whispers. "Of course I'll go and see your student. Of course I will. Call him now. We'll go now, yeah?"

"Really?" Liam asks and his voice is excited. "I'll call him in a minute. He's going to go crazy!"

"Yeah," Harry says flatly. "Great. Whatever I can do."

"Harry? What's wrong?" Liam asks, reaching out to drag Harry into a loose hug. "Tell me."

"My life is so fucked up," Harry whispers. "So fucked up, Liam. What I did to you was fucked up. I'm sorry. I'm so fucking sorry."

Liam hushes him gently and tucks Harry's head into his shoulder while he rubs his back soothingly.

"I used to be so trusting," Harry murmurs against Liam's shoulder. "Louis and Niall used to shout at me because I always believed the best of people, because I didn't understand why anyone would focus on the negative."

"What happened, Harry?" Liam asks gently and Harry realises it's the first time Liam's pried into his life. Harry knows he deserves to know, after the past week.

"I got screwed over," Harry says on a sigh. "A lot. People kept taking advantage. I lost a lot of money, which isn't important. I lost a lot of friends, which was upsetting but Louis pointed out that they weren't really friends in the first place. Mostly I was upset because I stopped trusting people. I lost a part of myself."

Liam hugs him closer and Harry relaxes into him.

"You should hate me," Harry mutters as he nuzzles into Liam's shoulder, seeking comfort and finding it.

"Impossible," Liam says and Harry can hear the smile in his voice.

"I'm an awful person," Harry tries again.

"Do you realise, Harry, that all you've actually done is send me a text, which was in no way abusive or mean, and ignored me for a week?" Liam asks, genuinely bemused. "Stop beating yourself up. I sent a stupid text when I should have spoken to you, explained first."

"Call him," Harry says as he lifts his head and smiles at Liam. "Call him and we'll go see him now, yeah?"

"Okay," Liam says as he pulls out his phone and dials a number.

***

"God, he's such a good kid," Harry sighs as they trudge into his apartment, six hours later. "Why do shit things happen to good kids?"

"Life sucks," Liam says sadly as he grabs two beers from Harry's never-ending supply and hands one to Harry. "Can we just sit on your sofa all night and watch crappy movies and forget everything?"

"Sounds perfect," Harry says, falling onto said sofa and tugging Liam down next to him. Harry curls himself into Liam's side. "I missed you. I'm sorry I was so stupid."

"I missed you too," Liam says quietly. "And stop apologising."

"How much did you miss me?" Harry knows he's being clingy and stupid, but something feels different between them now. Something's shifted and Harry's been too emotional and he's missed Liam so much that he's not worried anymore about pushing it. Part of him needs to push it.

"More than I thought possible," Liam says with a fond smile. "Sometimes I have to remind myself that we've only known each other a month."

"Best month of your life," Harry mumbles.

"Yeah, it kind of has been," Liam says and squeezes Harry closer.

Harry contents himself with that answer as they settle down to watch the television.

***

A week later, Louis sits Harry down after rehearsals.

"Look, what is going on with you and Liam?" he asks, Niall nodding next to him.

"We're good," Harry says with a fond smile. "He's brilliant. We sorted it all out. He forgave me because Liam's brilliant."

"Yes, Liam is brilliant," Louis agrees with an eye-roll to Niall. "Are you fucking?"

"I wish," slips out of Harry's mouth before he can stop it. His eyes widen and he looks up at them, startled.

"Figured as much," Louis mutters. "So what are you going to do about it?"

"Same thing I've been doing for the past month or so," Harry shrugs. "Spend as much time with him as I can manage without seeming creepy, hang off him until he pushes me away and wake up needing a cold shower every morning."

"That's a beautiful sentiment," Niall grins. "Why don't you just make out with him?"

"Because he's Liam and he's perfect and he can do so much better than a crappy popstar whose management company want him in the closet and who lets them because he has serious trust issues," Harry says quickly before shutting his mouth abruptly.

"Well, that's a load of shit," Louis says and Niall nods his head in agreement. "He clearly adores you, although god knows why. So just kiss him, yeah?"

"Because it's that easy," Harry mutters.

"Well, it worked with Zayn," Louis points out, his lips curving into a smile. "I reckon I'm ready to let management know about us."

"That's great, Lou," Harry says with a smile, reaching out to squeeze his hand. "But I'm not going to be kissing Liam. Even if he feels the same way, and I really don't think he does, he deserves better."

"We'll see," Louis says and for some reason, Harry's terrified.

***

When Harry arrives at Louis' place for movie night, Louis ushers him in and shoves him down onto the sofa where Liam's already made himself comfortable. Harry crawls over and settles himself against Liam's side because that's where he most wants to be and he knows Liam will lift his arm to pull him closer.

He ignores Niall's pointed looks. He ignores Louis' pointed comments. He tries to ignore how Liam's hand is stroking his side and how it's making him hot and shivery. Mostly he ignores the movie and spends the entire evening daydreaming about how Liam would look turned on and needy. How Liam might look naked and sweaty. How Liam might kiss, whether it would be gentle and romantic or hot and deep.

He spends a lot of the evening shifting around as his jeans become uncomfortably tight.

"Can't wait to enjoy our day off tomorrow," Niall says as the movie ends. "I'm going to spend the entire day on my sofa, playing Playstation."

"Sounds like a hoot," Louis says sarcastically. "I will be spending the day in bed."

He smirks at Zayn, who mostly ignores him but Harry sees Zayn's hand curl around Louis'.

"What about you, Harry?" Niall asks, throwing a piece of popcorn at him, laughing when Harry catches it in his mouth.

"Not sure," Harry says slowly. "Probably convince Liam to come round and keep me company since you're all so busy and stuff."

Liam beams at him and Harry grins back, taking it as agreement.

Louis bites his tongue, which Harry really does appreciate.

When they leave, Harry tucks his hand into Liam's arm and tugs him along, waving goodbye to Niall, who was heading in the opposite direction. Possibly to go see the bowling alley girl, Harry thinks, but Niall's staying strangely quiet on the girl front these days.

"You coming round tomorrow then?" Harry asks tiredly as they match their stride.

"Yeah, if you want me to," Liam says, smiling across at him.

"I always want you around," Harry says, not caring if it sounds exactly like he means it.

When Liam doesn't answer, Harry sneaks a look at him and sees Liam looking straight ahead, a big, crinkly-eyed smile on his face.

They turn into Harry's street and Harry lets out a little sigh as he retrieves his arm and turns to say goodnight.

"I was kind of thinking," Liam says slowly, and Harry blinks up at him questioningly. "I could just crash here tonight. I mean, I can just borrow some of your clothes tomorrow, right? We're practically the same size. Saves me going home?"

Harry's face lights up and he smacks a kiss against Liam's cheek before he grabs Liam's hand and pulls him to the door, unlocking it quickly and dragging Liam inside.

"I take it that's a yes?" Liam asks with a laugh as he grabs two beers from Harry's fridge. Harry fondly watches Liam making himself at home in Harry's apartment. He takes the beer Liam offers and crashes down onto the sofa, shifting as Liam drops down as well and rolling himself into Liam's side.

"It's always a yes," Harry mumbles, closing his eyes and briefly drifting into a daydream of Liam waking up in Harry's bed, all sexy and rumpled and naked.

Ugh.

"So what do you want to do to tomorrow?" Liam asks, nudging Harry gently.

"Fuck," Harry murmurs before his eyes widen and he has to stop himself from clamping his hand over his mouth because did he _actually say that out loud_? "Uh, fuck knows. Something good?"

Harry's heart's racing because he thinks he covered it but he knows his voice came out squeaky and he really needs to reign in those fantasies.

Liam puts his now empty beer on the table and yawns.

"Yeah, we should probably turn in," Harry says hurriedly as he scrambles to his feet and take their empty bottles to the kitchen. "Guest room is third door on the right. Bathroom is opposite it, there are some spare toothbrushes in there somewhere. Just take whatever you need."

"Thanks Harry," Liam says and reaches over to hug him before ambling off down the hall.

Harry watches him, admiring how narrow his waist looks compared to his broad shoulders and wondering for about the thousandth time what he looks like under all those stupid clothes he keeps wearing.

He forces himself to walk into this room and he quickly strips to his boxers and tries not to think about how Liam will be sleeping almost naked next door. All night. Maybe even totally naked.

Harry falls head first onto his head and groans into a pillow. He's so fucked. All he wants to get Liam into his bed and fucking wreck him, but he can't, for many, many reasons. It doesn't stop him wanting though. It doesn't stop the white hot need that races through him every time he looks at Liam, or touches Liam, or snuggles up to Liam.

His body feels like he's on fire. He needs a cold shower or a bucket of ice. Deciding on a cold drink instead, Harry pulls open the door and steps outside only to see Liam stepping out of the bathroom.

Harry almost weeps. Liam's just in his boxers and now Harry _knows_ what's lying beneath all those layers. A fucking Greek god, is what it is. Liam's arms are toned and muscular, much like the rest of his body. He has a six pack that has Harry drooling. He has beautiful, narrow hips and broad, strong shoulders that Harry wants to bury himself in.

He knows his mouth is hanging open but he can't seem to snap out of his daze.

When he finally manages to look up, he realises that Liam's watching him carefully.

"Harry?"

"Sorry," Harry flushes as his voice sounds a little croaky and really he normally has better restraint than this. He's seen naked men before. He's seen beautiful naked men before. But Liam is in a league all of his own, as far as Harry's concerned. "Um, just getting some water."

Liam steps closer and Harry feels his throat tighten. He's not sure he can handle a near-naked Liam at this distance.

He does the only thing he can in this moment. He runs for the kitchen and spends five minutes running cold water and splashing it on his face until he's calmed down enough to return to his bedroom, noting Liam's door is firmly shut, as it should be.

Harry spends most of the night wide awake, unable to stop remembering the contours of Liam's body and trying not to think about what his skin would feel like under Harry's hands.

Harry drags himself out of bed in the morning, grumpy and exhausted. He showers but he's still half-asleep when he throws some tracksuit pants, a t-shirt and some fresh underwear at Liam's door before slumping into the kitchen and turning on the coffee machine. He's on his second cup, blearily checking Twitter on his iPad when he hears the shower turn on. Harry deliberately pushes thoughts of naked Liam just down the hall out of his head and determinedly carries on reading Twitter, replying to fans and tweeting Louis and Niall to tease them about their tragic plans for their day off.

When Liam appears, Harry shoves a cup of coffee at him which Liam takes gratefully. It's not a crinkly-eyed smile, Harry frowns, but it's pretty close.

"So what are we going to do today?" Liam asks as he leans against the doorframe.

Harry tilts his head and considers their options. His face lights up as he figures it out. "Let's go for a run."

"A run?" Liam's voice is sceptical and Harry pouts childishly at him.

"Yes, Liam, a run. I do exercise, you know," Harry says, his tone verging on whining.

"Harry, I've not seen you do anything more energetic than walk across a stage in the entire time I've know you," Liam points out with a fond smile.

"Well, I've been taking a break," Harry says, injecting more sincerity into his voice than that white lie requires. "Today, I want to blow off some steam. Let's go running. And we can stop by yours on the way back to pick up some stuff so you can sleep over tonight, yeah?"

"You want me to stay the entire weekend?"

And there's the crinkly-eyed smile Harry loves so damn much. "Yes please," is all he says but he's beaming inside.

When they set off, Harry realises his mistake. To be exact, he forgot Liam was a gym teacher with the stamina of a bloody horse. After twenty minutes, Harry's breathing hard and Liam has barely broken a sweat. Harry glares at him as Liam cheers him on. He's considering shoving Liam into the street when Liam grabs Harry's hand and tugs him on, increasing their speed until they're racing each other as fast as they can before they both collapse onto the ground, laughing when they can catch their breath. Harry reaches over and shoves Liam anyway, grinning as Liam lets himself topple over and Harry raises his arms in victory.

"Steam all blown?" Liam asks as he takes a gulp from the bottle of water they're sharing, handing it over for Harry to drench his achingly dry throat.

"Yeah," Harry says as he lowers the bottle, reaching over to ruffle Liam's hair. "Thanks."

"Anytime, lazy bones," Liam teases.

Harry just rolls his eyes, because really he does know that he's too lazy, especially for the demands of their upcoming tour. Maybe Liam can train him, he thinks idly. Then he can watch Liam running around in shorts and tank tops or other equally distracting clothing choices.

"Let's swing by mine and then we can head back, yeah?"

Harry nods and holds out his arms. Liam jumps to his feet and pulls Harry up, laughing when Harry plasters himself against Liam's chest.

"Carry me," Harry whines.

"I can give you a piggyback," Liam offers and Harry's not sure if he's kidding or not. Harry's not one to pass up an offer like that though so he leaps up onto Liam's back, clinging until Liam's arms wrap around him and Harry's secure against Liam. "You know you're a child, right?"

"Hey, you offered," Harry points out and Liam just grins as he starts down the road, groaning when Harry imitates a whip sound.

By the time they arrive back at Harry's place, Harry's worn Liam out and offers to make lunch as a consolation for carrying Harry the entire distance.

"I might need a nap," Harry says lazily as he stretches out, his legs draped across Liam's lap after lunch.

Liam hums in what Harry thinks is agreement. "Sounds like a great plan."

Harry tugs Liam until he's lying down with Harry, face to face. Harry's sofas are pretty wide so there's plenty of room, and Harry's eyes are squeezed shut before Liam can protest or make any comment. When Liam doesn't move, Harry relaxes as he slips his arm around Liam's waist, humming happily when Liam's legs entangle with his.

He's asleep within seconds.

The rest of the day passes in idle paradise. They wake up, get competitive over Super Mario Kart, which Liam wins much to Harry's disgruntlement and Liam buys pizza, despite Harry's protests. They're halfway through watching some action movie that Harry isn't interested in when he realises that Liam's bored as well.

"You wanna turn it off?" Harry says, his voice a little huskier than it should be.

"Only if you're not watching it," Liam says solemnly and Harry aims a gentle kick at his thigh as he switches it off.

"What now?" Harry asks as he sits up, yawning.

"Uh, perhaps you need to go to bed," Liam teases as he reaches out to run his hand through Harry's curls.

Harry refuses to ask if that's an invitation, because he knows it's not.

"Yeah, maybe that's a good idea," is what Harry really says as he stands up and stretches, laughing as his shirt rides up and Liam reaches out to tickle his exposed tummy. "Heeeey!"

"Sorry," Liam says and Harry knows he's not sorry at all. He finds that a little hot.

"Come on," Harry reaches down and yanks Liam to his feet. "Let's go to bed."

Liam follows him down the hall. When Harry reaches his door, he turns to hug Liam goodnight. Liam's arms tighten around him and Harry sighs involuntarily. He's so lost in the warmth of Liam's hold that he doesn't realise his back is pressing against the wall. He doesn't notice that Liam's hands are slowly running up and down his arms.

"Harry," Liam murmurs.

That's when Harry realises.

He lifts his head and stares at Liam, who looks back at him with hooded eyes, his hands still moving. "Liam?" Harry's voice trembles slightly because he's scared to read that look wrong.

Liam moves slowly, keeping his eyes locked on Harry as his lips brush against Harry's. Harry feels himself leaning forward, chasing Liam's lips after that brief touch. Harry watches as Liam's eyes close and this time his lips press against Liam's. Harry grabs Liam's shoulders as he increases the pressure, moving his lips and sliding against Liam's mouth until he coaxes Liam's mouth open and whimpers as he feels Liam's tongue licking into his mouth.

Harry's lost as Liam slowly devastates Harry's mouth, working him into a shivering, needy wreck as he's pressed harder against the wall by Liam's firm body. Liam slips his leg between Harry's and starts rocking into Harry, grinding against him as they both pant slowly into each other's mouths.

Harry's hands are racing across Liam's body, finally learning the feel and touch of Liam's arms and shoulders and back. He groans as he digs his fingers into soft skin, holding onto Liam's biceps tightly as he shifts up to wrap a leg around Liam's waist. He whimpers again as he leverages himself up, helped by Liam as he wraps his other leg around Liam and Liam's hands hold him up.

Liam's head drops to trail kisses down Harry's throat, forcing little cries of encouragement from Harry's lips.

"Liam," Harry pants finally as he leans down to capture Liam's lips again, forcing the kiss to deepen as he thrusts his tongue inside Liam's mouth and groans as Liam rocks him up and down against his body. "Liam. Bed."

He feels Liam's nod as the wall seems to give way on his back. Harry falls forward onto Liam as he realises Liam's carrying him into his room. He's not used to being carried, being that he's normally the taller one but he loves the sensation. He whines in delight as he bends down to fasten his mouth onto Liam's collarbone, sucking and kissing and marking Liam with a love bite. When Harry feels himself falling back, Liam's arms are still around him and they land together, Harry gently tucked beneath Liam as Liam stares down at him.

Harry blinks slowly before he lifts his lips into a broad smile. "Hey."

"Hey," Liam echoes softly before he lowers his head and catches Harry's lips before moving away.

Harry whimpers at the loss of contact but he's quickly on board when he hears a zip being lowered. Looking up through his eyelashes, Harry watches as Liam pulls his top over his head, revealing those beautiful muscles that have been driving Harry crazy and lets his jeans fall. He reaches out and Harry lifts up quickly, pulling his own top up and over his head and lifting his hips to let Liam drag his jeans off.

When Liam lowers himself again over Harry, he shivers at the feel of Liam's taut, warm chest against his own. Harry places his hand over Liam's heart, smiling as he feels it racing. He grabs Liam's hand and places it over his own heart and watches as Liam realises that Harry's heart is racing as well.

Harry's been waiting for this for so long that he thinks his heart might just explode. He reaches up to bite lightly on Liam's lower lip, something he's been aching to do for weeks. When Liam groans, Harry grins and starts nibbling as Liam's hands roam across Harry's back, forcing him to arch into Liam's body and causing them both to shiver.

Harry feels the tension building inside and he aches to drive Liam wild, as wild as he's been feeling for so long now. His thighs grip Liam's waist and he manoeuvres them around until Harry's straddling Liam, who's now spread out against Harry's bed, looking gorgeous and just where Harry's imagined him a million times in his dreams. Half-mad with want, Harry wriggles down until he's looking at the waistband of Liam's boxers. Glancing up and seeing Liam looking dazed and as needy as he is, Harry hooks his fingers in the waistband and nudges Liam until he lifts his hips. Harry drags Liam's boxers off and his hand reaches down to grip Liam's cock firmly, enjoying the feel and the weight of it in his hand.

He can't speak, afraid to break the spell they're under, so he takes Liam's groan as encouragement and he starts to stroke Liam slowly, moving his hand slowly up and down, watching as Liam's eyes close and his body starts to move against the sheets with every stroke Harry gives him.

Harry's determined to feel Liam fall apart in his hands tonight, so he speeds up a little, pausing to spit into his hand, soothing Liam as he whines at the loss of contact with a firm hand gripping his hip before his other hand returns to stroke Liam. He can feel the tension rising in Liam's body and he sees the way Liam's toes curl up. Harry reaches down to feather kisses across Liam's flat stomach, his hand moving away from Liam's cock as his mouth travels down Liam's hips.

He hears Liam's whine seconds before he closes his mouth around the tip of Liam's cock, sucking gently and listening to Liam's groan. He shifts so that he's straddling Liam's legs, his hands gripping Liam's hips tightly to keep him in place as he slowly opens his mouth wider to accommodate Liam's shaft. He bobs up and down, taking more in each time he dips and sucking hard as he lifts. His cheeks hollow as he opens his throat and feels Liam's cock slip through his mouth, groaning as he hits the back of Harry's throat.

Liam's gasping loudly, his hands buried in Harry's hair as Harry holds his hips down to stop Liam fucking into his mouth. Harry sucks harder, crying out around Liam's dick as Liam tugs on his hair, vibrating around Liam's cock.

He can feel the tautness in Liam's body and he lets go of Liam's hips, letting his hands slip down onto the bed to keep himself upright as Liam jerks up uncontrollably into his mouth. He hears Liam swear as his body arches off the bed and he comes long and loudly into Harry's mouth. Harry swallows as best he can, pulling off Liam with a wet, sloppy kiss and wiping at his mouth.

Liam's hands are pulling him up and Harry finds himself being kissed long and hard.

"Harry," Liam whispers and Harry can hear the tremor in his voice, can hear how totally wrecked Liam is. Harry smiles to himself. "Let me."

Harry's already rock hard from getting Liam off. As Liam tugs Harry's boxers down and his cock springs up, hard and fat, Liam groans in appreciation before kissing Harry again, thrusting his tongue into Harry's mouth in a rhythm matched by Liam's strokes on Harry's cock.

Already worked up after months of foreplay, Harry tries to hold on as his body tightens. Liam's grasp is firm and his twist is just right, driving Harry mad as he breaks the kiss, grips the sheets and clenches his teeth, lost in sensation. Liam leans down to suck a matching love bite onto Harry's chest as his grip tightens slightly and he moves faster, sucking on Harry's chest and driving him mad.

"Fuck, Liam," Harry pants seconds before his body stiffens and he comes over Liam's hand and Harry's stomach. Harry's trembling as he orgasms, his entire body going lax as Liam works him through his orgasm.

Harry's so pliant that he just watches as Liam presses tiny kisses down Harry's chest until he reaches his stomach and he licks at Harry's come, cleaning him up.

Harry can't even process what's just happened and how hot Liam is right now, licking at his stomach, naked and satisfied because of Harry.

They don't speak as Liam lifts the covers and half picks Harry up to slide him under, Liam slipping under as well and spooning behind Harry.

Harry's half-asleep in a post-coital daze, lost in thoughts about why, how, what and fuck did that just happen, when Liam presses a kiss against Harry's shoulder and Harry reaches down to grab Liam's hand and hold it against his stomach. He thinks he'll figure it all out in the morning, when his brain isn't mush and he can process thoughts once again.

***

Harry wakes up to find Liam entwined around him like a vine. Images from last night flash through Harry's mind and he can't quite believe that any of it happened. Everything feels like a dream, one he's had a hundred times before but Liam's really asleep in his bed, his arm heavy across Harry's chest and Harry shifts so that he's facing Liam and he just watches him sleep.

It's hard to believe Liam's really here, that Liam's slept in his bed after giving Harry one of the best orgasms he's ever had, when Harry's dreamt about it for so long. He now knows that Liam kisses long and hard, he knows what Liam looks like naked and he knows that the most beautiful sight in the world is Liam with his lips parted in need, his eyes heavy and filled with desire, his body stiffen with want. He doesn't have to wonder anymore, because Liam's let him into all his secrets.

Idly, Harry wonders whether he should get up and make breakfast, he knows he has coffee, he thinks he has granola or something that he could put on a tray. He's distracted though by Liam's chest moving up and down in even synchronicity. He wants to press kisses all over Liam's body and let his fingers trail across every inch until he knows Liam as intimately as he can.

If Harry could freeze any moment in time, it'd be this one, he thinks. Or maybe last night as Liam came so beautifully in Harry's mouth, head thrown back and hips high, muscles taut and strong. It was humbling for Harry to realise that someone as strong and controlled as Liam could fall apart in Harry's arms.

He crawls out of bed, careful not to wake Liam and heads for the kitchen, yawning as he switches on the coffee machine. He pours a cup and pulls up Twitter on his iPad.

Five minutes later, he's cursing and calling management because they've done it again. He's apparently been holed up in Vegas for two nights with some blonde model who's coyly denying it on Twitter.

He gets nowhere because this is his life, crazy as it is. He shouts and fumes down the phone but they don't budge and just calmly remind him of his contract. He's expected to not deny the rumours and encourage them at any available moment.

Twitter is going crazy. Social media is having a meltdown. And he's pretty sure he'll have paps crawling around for days now to get a shot of the 'lovebirds'.

Fuck. Liam.

Harry scrubs his face with his hands as he realises that the paparazzi might be camped outside his door right now and they're going to notice Liam leaving. The timing couldn't be worse. He's finally got Liam in his bed and now this. He's finally happy, couldn't be happier in fact, and now he's got to go do the rounds in the press, pretending to be seeing this girl who he's never even met before.

He can't do this to Liam. Liam won't understand and he won't go along with it. Harry can barely stand to go along with it. Until Harry can force management to back off and let Harry be who he is, he can't see Liam. His heart breaks slowly, painfully as he makes his decision. He has to do what's best for Liam, even if Harry breaks in the process. He knows Liam won't necessarily wait for him. But he can't force Liam to live Harry's life, or Liam will start to change like Harry did, and Harry never wants Liam to change, to be anyone other than who he is right now.

Taking a deep breath, Harry tenses and heads back to the bedroom. He reaches out to brush Liam's hair back from where it's just flattened against his face tenderly before his hand drops to Liam's shoulder and he pushes hard.

"Liam," Harry says, forcing his voice to sound hard. "Liam, wake up."

Liam grumbles and tries to hide under a pillow.

Refusing to find it adorable, Harry grabs the pillow and whacks Liam with it. "Get up."

"Harry?" Liam asks sleepily as he opens his eyes and he's crinkly-eying Harry.

"Liam, you've got to go," Harry says firmly.

"Go?" Liam repeats, sitting up and frowning at him.

"Yeah," Harry says, forcing himself to look Liam in the eye. "Last night was great, but it was a massive mistake. You've got to go."

"A mistake?" Liam's voice drops to a whisper and Harry wants to throw himself out the window as he hears the pain in Liam's voice.

"We shouldn't have done that," Harry says thinly. "I'm sorry. But please, go."

"Yeah," Liam says slowly, looking at Harry with pained eyes. "Yeah I'll go. Sorry."

Harry turns away and squeezes his eyes shut. "It's fine. But please get out of here."

He hears Liam dressing quickly and feels a feathery kiss being pressed against the top of his head. He wants to weep but he holds himself in until he hears the front door close. Then he crawls into bed, breathing in Liam's scent from the sheets and the pillows.

***

Harry shuts himself off from the world for two weeks. He doesn't leave his apartment and he lets no one in, except for the takeaway delivery men. He ignores calls from management and from the boys.

Liam doesn't call.

Harry doesn't check Twitter and he doesn't turn on the radio or watch the television. Mostly he bangs his head against hard surfaces and wraps himself up in his sheets until he can't smell Liam on them anymore and throws them off in disgust.

He was in love. He was desperately, foolishly in love with Liam and he can't have him because his life is not his own. Not that he deserves Liam at all, so really he's better off without him.

But it hurts. It hurts so deeply that Harry can't breathe sometimes when he thinks about Liam and when he thinks about that night.

***

"HARRY STYLES OPEN THIS DOOR SO I KNOW YOU'RE NOT DEAD!"

Harry stares at the door, knowing an angry Louis is standing on the other side.

"I'm not dead, Lou," he shouts back.

"OPEN THIS FUCKING DOOR NOW."

Harry propels himself forward and opens the door, finding himself with a handful of Louis.

"You scared the shit out of us," Louis mutters against his shoulder. "Niall was contemplating breaking and entering."

"Was a good plan," Niall murmurs and Harry realises that he's got two handfuls.

"Come on," Harry says with a sigh as he untangles himself and heads inside. Louis makes tea because that's what he does and hands Harry a mug before taking a seat with Niall on the sofa. "Go on, yell."

"Why would we yell?" Niall asks. "We think it's brilliant."

"Brilliant?" Harry stares at Niall. "Wait, what?"

"You and Liam. It's brilliant," Niall says again. "I mean, he's been all sad and stuff that he can't see you, but yeah, brilliant."

Harry shakes his head as if to clear it. He glances at Louis to see if he thinks Niall's mad as well, but he's just watching Harry carefully.

"Niall, what the hell are you talking about?" Harry asks finally.

"Haven't you seen the papers? Been on Twitter? There are pictures everywhere," Niall says matter-of-factly.

"Pictures of what?" Harry asks, dread filling his stomach.

"Liam leaving here early that Sunday," Niall says slowly as he seems to realise that Harry truly doesn't know what he's talking about. "Harry, have you been on the internet at all?"

Harry shakes his head, dumbfounded.

"Oh babe," Louis finally says and reaches out to grab Harry's hand. "Liam was papped leaving here looking thoroughly loved up and just-sexed. Your secret is out. And I do mean _out_."

"He told them I'm gay?" Harry asks slowly, his eyes widening in shock.

"No of course not," Louis brushes that off. "But anyone looking at him with that love bite on his chest and wearing your clothes would know that he'd been having sex in your apartment. Liam denied it of course and he ranted about that model you were supposedly seeing in Vegas, about how your personal life wasn't anyone's business but your own and you were a lovely lad with lots of friends who may or may not get mistaken for lovers. It was really very sweet. Very defensive, that Liam. Very loyal."

Harry cannot compute what Louis is telling him. "What did management do?"

"The only thing they could," Niall says apologetically. "They made a statement saying that your private life was your own and that you'd never met that model or some of the ones before that. Coupled with the shots of Liam, and voila. Everyone kind of knows."

"And management haven't dropped me yet," Harry murmurs, absolutely floored.

"Nah, turns out you're just as popular gay as you are straight," Louis teases. "But Liam will be dying to see you."

"Um, I don't think he will somehow," Harry says and he wants to go back to banging his head against wall because it's less painful than this. He still stands by his decision. His life is crazy stupid and he won't drag Liam into it so that he has to face the press or anyone who might attack him or try to trick him into saying something he doesn't mean.

"Wait," Niall says and leans forward to grab Harry's other hand. "We thought you were holed up because of the whole outing thing. But since that was a massive surprise, you were holed up for other reasons. Liam?"

"We kind of fell into bed together that Saturday night," Harry says slowly. Louis nods as if he already knows, and he might, since he's with Liam's best friend and all. "Then I woke up to that media crap about Vegas and I realised that Liam was better off miles away from me and this crazy life I'm expected to live. So I kind of threw him out."

"You're an idiot," Louis says quietly.

"Plus, you're a famous gay idiot, so you can date Liam all you like now," Niall points out helpfully. "You can hold hands in public, skip through meadows together, all that crap that couples in love do."

"I have never skipped through a meadow," Louis says thoughtfully. "I wonder if I can talk Zayn into that."

"Probably," Niall says with a shrug. "But Harry, you _can_ be with Liam now."

"No," Harry shakes his head, his resolve in place. "No, I can't. He deserves more."

Nothing Louis or Niall said to him that day changed his mind.

***

Two weeks later and it still hurts to think about Liam. It still hurts to hear his name, as he does now and again when Louis talks about Zayn. It hurts when Niall tries to tell him that Liam wants to see him.

It just hurts and Harry wants it all to go away. He wants to see Liam and bury himself in his arms and he wants to kiss him senseless until everything else disappears. He wants Liam to lose control in his arms and he wants to see Liam blissed out in the middle of his bed, wrecked and gorgeous and happy. Most of all, he just wants Liam to be there.

Louis and Niall have to drag him to their next intimate gig. He's hardly left the house in a month. When he has ventured outside, he's been faced with a barrage of questions from paps waiting outside that he's duly ignored. Niall manages to somehow distract the paps and Louis smuggles him out to the waiting car. Niall jumps in and they take off.

It's not until they climb out of the car that Harry realises they're at Jakes.

"Surpriiiiiise?" Louis half-asks as he does his best jazz-hands impression.

"Really? Here?" Harry says, staring up at the sign. When life had been so simple with his stupid little crush instead of the tragic love story it became.

"Let's go," Niall pushes him inside and it takes all of five minutes for them to get on stage.

Harry's lost himself in a slow cover, singing to a ghost when he looks up and sees Liam watching him from the bar. He's not surprised, he'd been expecting it from the moment he saw the sign. He's about done fighting himself so he gives in, singing directly to Liam and not looking away once. He sings the next three songs to Liam exclusively, pouring out his heart in his raspy refrain.

When the set ends, Liam doesn't clap but he does smile very faintly.

Harry wants to run over to him but Louis is ushering him offstage and they spend five minutes sorting out their stuff while Harry slowly hyperventilates.

"There's nothing to be worried about," Louis assures him for the tenth time. "He wants you. You just have to grovel. You want to grovel, don't you Harry?"

Harry nods. He really does. He wants to be everything Liam wants and needs. But he's so damn afraid.

"Go get him," Niall whispers as he squeezes Harry's hand and shoves him through a back door that Harry hadn't even noticed. Liam's standing there by the wall, clearly waiting for him.

"Liam," Harry's voice breaks as he murmurs his name but he doesn't reach out. He can't.

Liam just looks at him, like he's reacquainting himself with Harry.

Finally, he nods towards the street. "Let's go back to yours and talk."

Harry follows Liam to the waiting car. They don't talk on the journey. They don't touch. Harry thinks it's even worse to be close to Liam and not touching him than to not see him at all.

When they get out of the car, flashes from cameras are going off as Harry grabs Liam's hand and they fight their way through to his apartment.

"Sorry about that," Harry says quietly as they step inside.

"Just goes with the territory, right?" Liam says with a shrug.

"Yeah." Harry twists his hands nervously. He doesn't know what to say or what to do. It's a weird feeling for him because normally he can talk himself out of anything. But this is too important. It's too everything.

Liam's hand closes over Harry's and he stops twisting immediately. He glances up to see Liam just watching him.

"I don't know why you're here, Liam," Harry says finally, glancing away from Liam's lovely, earnest face. "I just keep screwing up. I keep hurting you."

"I'm pretty resilient," Liam says.

"You should be angry," Harry counters before he spins away and stares out of the window, unseeing. "You should hate me and shout at me and walk away from me right now."

The silence hangs heavy between them and Harry feels like he can't breathe.

"Do you want me to do all those things?" Liam asks quietly.

"No," Harry yells as he spins around. "I want you to kiss me and I want you to forgive me and I want you to put your arms around me and tell me everything's going to be okay!"

He sees Liam take a step towards him and Harry throws up his arms and steps back. "No, because it's not about what I want. It's about what's best for you and I'm not what's best for you. Not by a long shot."

"Do I get a say in this?" Liam asks, and Harry thinks he's genuinely curious. "Because after I got over being thrown out of bed and your apartment after the best night of my life and finally getting close to you, I realised why you'd done it. Especially after I'd shouted at the paps outside and kind of sort of been responsible for maybe outing you."

"Best night of your life?" Harry repeats in a whisper, his heart racing.

"Sorry about outing you, by the way," Liam says, moving closer and smiling when Harry doesn't step back. "Do you hate me?"

Harry shakes his head, dumbstruck. "Tell me more about how it was the best night of your life."

Liam smiles and Harry watches it shift into his crinkly-eyed smile. "Kissing you was amazing, Harry. I'd been wanting to kiss you since forever."

"Me too," Harry murmurs as Liam inches closer. "I had dreams. And daydreams. And wet dreams."

Liam laughs as he stops in front of Harry. "Same."

"You should really run away from me as fast as you can run," Harry says as Liam slips his arms around Harry and tugs him closer. "I'm a bit of a mess."

"You're really not," Liam says sternly. "Everyone has their issues. I'm broke and proud and have trouble letting people help me out. But if you're honest with me, and stop throwing me out of your life, then we can be something amazing. Because you're amazing and you need me around to remind you of that."

"You have this annoying habit of breaking down all my defenses," Harry grumbles, but he smiles as Liam tangles their legs together. "Which makes me terrified that you're going to just leave and I'll fall apart because ..."

"I'm not leaving," Liam says, leaning down to nip at Harry's collarbone. "I feel like I've waited for you forever."

"How are you so perfect?" Harry laughs as he lifts his arms around Liam's neck. "Seriously, how are you even real?"

"I'm not even close to being perfect," Liam says earnestly.

"Don't ruin my illusions, Liam," Harry says smiling. "Let me bask in your perfection for a little longer."

"You're an idiot," Liam says fondly.

Harry laughs, throwing back his head and clinging to Liam. "I'm your idiot."

"Yeah, you are." Liam stares at Harry for a few seconds before capturing Harry's lips in a gentle kiss.

Harry sighs happily as Liam slowly drives him crazy.

When he lifts his head, he suddenly dips and Harry finds himself thrown over Liam's shoulder. Laughing, he swats at Liam's arse as Liam carries him into the bedroom. He throws him on the bed and quickly strips him before slipping out of his own clothes.

But when Liam just slips under the covers and cuddles Harry close, he's confused.

"Liam?"

"I just want to hold you tonight, remind myself that you're real, that you're really here with me," Liam whispers in the darkness. "I missed you. So much."

"Me too," Harry sighs as he curls closer. "So much."

"Go to sleep, Harry," Liam says quietly, pressing a kiss against Harry's shoulder. "And try not to throw me out in the morning."

***

When Liam wakes up, it's to Harry's grinning face inches away from his own. "Harry?"

"Morning sleepyhead," Harry murmurs before dropping a quick kiss onto his lips. "Sit up."

Liam hauls himself up, blinking slowly as a tray with coffee and granola is placed over his lap. There's also a small vase with a single daisy inside.

"I know it's cheesy and stupid," Harry grins happily, completely unabashed. "But I thought about doing it last time and never got the chance to."

Liam says nothing but he leans over to cup his hand around Harry's neck and brings him closer to kiss him long and slow.

"Stay," Harry asks softly against Liam's lips. It's just a word, but it means everything. It means I trust you. It means I want you. It means I need you. It means I can't be without you.

Liam just smiles and shifts so that Harry can sit next to him and pretend he's not going to steal Liam's granola the first chance he gets.


End file.
